How To Get Over A Breakup When It's All Your Fault

Going through a breakup is difficult, but it is a common experience. It can be even harder to move on from a breakup when it is caused by one's own actions. In addition to coping with the loss of a loved one, feelings of guilt can also be overwhelming in these situations. It can be a painful and difficult process.

Allow yourself time to process the end of the relationship, and then move forward. It is the only way to heal. While it may be difficult in the present, it is important to remember that all breakups are hard.


1. Accept that you screwed up

Accepting responsibility for one's actions is key in moving on from a breakup, especially when it was caused by one's own mistakes. Acknowledge what you did, whether it was lying, cheating or any other behavior, and understand that it cannot be undone. This acknowledgment is an important step in moving forward.


2. Realize it probably would've ended anyway

If one's actions contributed to the end of a relationship, it may indicate that the relationship was not meant to last. While this may not always be the case, it can provide some solace in knowing that the relationship may have ended sooner rather than later. This can be a small comfort in moving on.


3. Stop blaming everyone else

It can be difficult to take responsibility for one's actions in a failed relationship, and it may be tempting to place blame elsewhere. One may blame their partner for not showing up on time or not getting along with friends. However, until one accepts that their actions played a role in the failure of the relationship, it will be difficult to move on. Taking responsibility for one's actions is an important step in the healing process.


4. Confess to your BFF

It can be natural to want to continue communication with an ex, but it is important to respect their space and give them time to process the end of the relationship. Instead, try talking through your feelings with a trusted friend or family member who will be honest with you and can offer a different perspective. This can help you move on in a healthy way.


5. Is this a recurring mistake?

Reflect on past relationships and consider if patterns of behavior or mistakes are recurrent. Identifying any underlying issues is a crucial step in overcoming this breakup and avoiding similar mistakes in the future. This self-awareness and introspection can be a valuable tool in personal growth and development.


6. Try to actually learn something

Instead of dwelling on the past and dwelling on what could have been, focus on learning from the mistakes made in the relationship. Reflect on why certain actions, such as pushing your partner away, lying, cheating, or constantly arguing, led to the end of the relationship. Seeing the breakup as a learning opportunity can help you grow and improve in future relationships, and avoid repeating the same mistakes.


7. Forgive yourself

After taking responsibility for one's actions, learning from the mistakes, and accepting what happened, the next step is to forgive oneself. Remember that everyone makes mistakes and the current consequences may seem overwhelming, but it is important to recognize that no one is perfect. Self-forgiveness is crucial to move on and heal from the breakup.


8. Take some time to enjoy rolling solo

It's important to remember that being single also has its own set of benefits. It can be a time for self-discovery and personal growth. It's possible that the end of the relationship may have been what you subconsciously wanted. Take this time to focus on yourself, and avoid jumping into dating or rebound relationships. Embrace your single status and make the most of it.


9. Apologize to your ex

Even though your ex-partner may not be ready to talk to you, try to reach out to them and apologize for your actions that led to the breakup. A face-to-face apology is ideal, but if that is not possible, a phone call or written apology can also be effective. While they may not forgive you, making a sincere apology can help you in the healing process. It is important to remember that the apology is for you and not for them and it can be a closure for you.


10. Take a break and try again

If reconciliation is possible with your ex, it is best to give them time and space to process the past before attempting to rekindle the relationship. Allow for a period of healing before considering reconciliation.

11. Remind yourself you'll find someone new

It may take time, but you will eventually move on and find someone new after a breakup. Keep in mind that your ex is not the only single person out there, and eventually, you will come across someone who is a better fit for you.


12. Stay close to friends in the meantime

Breakups of this nature can be particularly difficult, it's important to lean on your friends for support during the healing process. They can help lift your spirits and prevent impulsive actions such as seeking temporary relief through casual relationships.