You've met this incredibly amazing woman, and you may already be in love, but here comes the devastating realization: All she wants is a friendship!
All your hopes melt like ice in the sun because obviously, you have been friend-zoned.
"Why do I always end up as the good friend?" you ask yourself desperately. And more importantly, you start wondering how to get out of the friendzone?
You haven't given up just yet, because you feel she is the perfect candidate for a happy relationship.
In this article, I will tell you about the most serious mistakes putting you in the friendzone. You will also learn how to get out of the friendzone and (hopefully) create a romantic relationship.
What Is The Friendzone?
Before we look at how to get out of the friendzone, it's important to understand what the phrase means.
A friendzone means the state in which one person wants more than friendship but feels like the other person "just wants to stay friends." This means one partner wants a platonic relationship while the other wants a romantic relationship.
This is a problem that seems to affect many people, particularly guys. The term originally comes from the series Friends, in which the main character Joey uses it to describe his relationship dilemma. Today, a lot of guys can relate to this character's predicament.
Although there are also women who feel that there are in the friend zone, many times, it's the guys who are wondering how to get out of the friend zone.
Before learning how to get out of the friend zone, you need to know what leads to this situation in the first place.
What Kind Of Friendzone Are You In?
If you are here looking for answers on how to get out of the friendzone, you probably feel that your relationship does not resemble a typical dating process. To make things clear, these are the different types of friend zones.
Firstly, we have the "creeping friends' zone." In this scenario, you got to know each other relatively easily and hang out a lot in groups. After a while, you suddenly realize that you would much rather have her all to yourself instead of just "hanging out."
Unfortunately, you realize that you are bonding as friends instead of romantic partners, which leaves you wondering how to get out of the friend zone.
Secondly, we have "the missed moment zone." You've been out a few times in this scenario, but nothing concrete ever happened. And now, the moment for the first kiss seems to be over.
Finally, we have "the substitute boyfriend friendzone." She calls you about every little thing and always needs your help. This behavior is very one-sided, and she doesn't seem to realize how much you make a fool of yourself in the process. It could mean she's unaware of how you feel about her, or she's badly friend-zoned you on purpose.
Signs She Has Friendzoned You
Perhaps you wonder whether you have already been friend-zoned or whether the woman (still) sees you as an attractive man or potential partner. Before learning how to get out of the friend zone, it is good to know if she has friend-zoned you in the first place.
Confirm if you have seen any of these 12 signs:
She emphasizes that you two are excellent buddies and says that your friendship is very important to her. It's possible she also uses a couple of friendzone words girls normally say.
When you meet her, she tends to wear casual clothes and little makeup instead of dressing up really nicely.
You almost exclusively talk about her problems, and she appreciates you as an attentive listener.
She tells you stories about her life in detail, mostly complaining about the guys.
There's no hot flirting on your dates, nor does she suggest that she's into you.
There is hardly any sexual touching but rather friendly physical contact (buddy handshake, backslapping, etc.).
She often contacts you because she wants your help (fixing computers, renovating an apartment, playing chauffeur, helping with homework/college work, and other favors).
With her feminine body language, she does not send any signals of sexual interest.
She does NOT seem shy, embarrassed, or nervous around you.
You don't have "classic" romantic dates but rather mate-like meetings, usually in groups with other friends.
As a "good friend," she advises you to get involved with other women romantically and shows no trace of jealousy.
As soon as you want to flirt with her or do anything to suggest you want a relationship, she cleverly evades the situation.
The more of these points you can answer with "YES," then the deeper you are in the friendzone. You should get out of this situation quickly if you still want to have a chance with her.
Avoid The Friendzone, And You Won't Have To Learn How To Get Out Of The Friendzone
While you can get out of the friendzone, it is certainly better to avoid it altogether. If you can avoid the friend zone, you can avoid having to find tips on how to get off the friend zone.
And yes, women get friend-zoned too. The tricks on how to get out of the friendzone are the same. Instead of passively accepting the situation, you should do something to change your situation.
Be warned, though: getting out of the friendzone doesn't have to mean you are getting into a relationship. It can just as well mean you are getting out of the superficial friendship and having proper dates.
How To Confess Your Feelings To A Woman
The easiest trick on how to get out of the friend zone is to speak bluntly about your feelings. In case you didn't know, many guys end up in the friend zone due to the way they speak to the girls they are interested in. That's why you should avoid conversation mistakes that can put you in the friendzone.
Even as you speak openly, you should carefully plan what you are going to say. It is also important to stay realistic and understand if she is interested in the kind of relationship you want to have with her, to begin with.
Trust your gut, and if it says, "Warning, the vibes are bad," don't do it.
Nevertheless, it's perfectly okay to want more out of your relationship. Besides, you might not know what you really want until you confess those feelings to her. So, show her how you feel.
Finally, here is how to get out of the friend zone. These are the mistakes you need to avoid.
Mistake 1: You Are Too Available
You are always there for her through little her aches and pains, and all her troubles and wants. Maybe you even get a: "You're soo great."
The first step on how to get out of the friend zone is to retreat. Go away for the weekend and make yourself unavailable.
Don't reach out to her all the time if want to get out of the friend zone. You may also turn down offers to meet because you don't have time.
Instead, do other exciting things. Travel, take part in sports, or attend cultural events. Just go out! In this way, you can get your mind off things.
First, the woman will start to miss you and become increasingly interested in you. Secondly, she will see that you have an exciting life full of adventure, which further increases your attractiveness.
Mistake 2: You Are Her Therapist
You listen to her stories about other men. If you keep doing that, then it's likely she won't want to go any further with you anymore.
Rather, steer off the topic and suggest or offer her a nicer date than the last jerk she dated. The trick on how to get out of the friendzone is to stir her imagination and show her that you are boyfriend material, not her therapist.
Mistake 3: You Only Hang Out In Groups
If you are always hanging out with other people around. Stop it! Better plan a real date.
You can also take over the bill and tell her: "After all, it's a date." It is a well-known fact that love goes through the stomach.
Mistake 4: Your Meetings Are Too Casual
Just because you are always chilling out on the couch, it does not mean you are safe from the friendzone. Take the initiative and introduce her to your circle of friends.
This is an important step in becoming part of each other's lives and as a first step before introducing her to the family. But before that, you should have a conversation about your relationship.
Instead of looking for ways how to get out of the friendzone, treat her like a date, and not a friend.
Mistake 5: You Text Each Other All The Time
How about a phone call instead of a text? It's a lot more intimate. Specifically, you can ask something like, "Wouldn't you rather come over, I think it would be nice to see you."
Mistake 6: You Don't Compliment Her Well
Her friends have already complimented her on her new jumper. But no one has made it clear to her today how good she smells; or just how attractive she is.
There are tons of ways to give her a special compliment. Learn how to get out of the friendzone by flirting with her, and teasing her a little so that she can see you in a different light.
Mistake 7: You're Not Getting Closer
As long as she is not comfortable around you, you will remain in the friendzone. Fortunately, if you don't get the feeling that she's comfortable around you, you can change the situation by making simple requests.
For instance, you can ask: "May I take your hand?" Simply kissing her without warning can also be seen as a betrayal of friendship.
Mistake 8: You Don't Exchange Caresses
Have you broken the touch barrier? It could be what's keeping you in the friendzone.
Of course, you don't have to start with a French kiss. Start with a back massage. If she purrs like a little kitten, dare a little.
She's stiff as a board? Then don't push too hard, but ask what the problem is.
Mistake 9: You Don't Make Your Intentions Very Clear
If none of the subtle signs work, the only trick on how to get out of the friendzone is to tell her how you feel about her directly.
So, don't procrastinate any longer, but in an intimate moment tell her, "I want more of you and this friendship."
At least, this will help you know how she feels.
Mistake 10: You Lack Assertiveness
Have you ever found a woman unattractive because her behavior seemed way too masculine? You probably thought: "I could only be friends with her, but I would never sleep with her?"
The opposite is true for women. Most girls like an assertive and direct partner, who has qualities like strength, self-esteem, determination, and independence.
For example, do you always let her decide what to do at the meeting instead of taking the lead? Then you shouldn't be surprised if you end up in the friendzone.
If you are unsure how to get out of the friend zone, try to be more assertive.
You Don't Have To Remain Stuck In The Friendzone
As we have just seen, if you want to get out of the friendzone, make it clear to her that she is a dream woman and you can take care of her.
Even if she still says no, at least you will know the truth. You can finally stop wondering how to get out of the friendzone and live your life.
Look at it this way: after the rejection, you can finally approach other women again.
And the friendship? That's up to you. You can pursue the friendship or end it.
The best part is that she might have the same feelings towards you. Maybe she was also wondering how to get out of the friendzone, just like you.