Tinder allows you to meet people you might be too shy to go for in real life. If you hop on the dating app, you’ll be surprised at how easy it is to start chatting with your perfect match in a virtual environment.
But what would you do to keep the conversation going? What if you could command someone’s attention and instantly connect with them?
When it comes to flirting on Tinder, you have the power to turn any conversation from boring to sensual. It’s not out of your reach. Still, you’ll need to figure out a way to connect while keeping the conversation safe for both of you.
8 Tips to Safe Flirting on Tinder
We know know it’s a bit mind-boggling to stare at their cute profile picture, struggling to figure out how you can play it safe and not end up in the spam bin. Even if you’re not exactly the greatest flirt alive, here are some tips to help you flirt safely on Tinder.
1. Start with a compliment
Try to get to know your match and strike up a friendly conversation, but you should avoid small talk. It’s kind of a buzz kill. Keep an open mind when you look through their profile. Pick something you can compliment them on, either by making fun of them in a light-hearted way or being downright sincere.
This is a great way to build attraction, but if your match is offended, don’t push it. Apologize immediately, and try asking a question instead. But if they’re really not happy, just move on and leave them alone. The goal is to make a connection, not make someone uncomfortable.
2. Stay confident
Confidence is one of the best weapons you’ve got. Like J Cole once said, “Anything’s possible, you gotta dream like you never seen the obstacles.” Keep your head up, your shoulders back, and then go for it!
As long as you’re being respectful, the worst thing that could happen is nothing at all.
3. Be clear and direct
Everyone loves people who are clear about what they want. If you want to have your match’s contact information, all you have to do is ask. If you want to hang out later, ask.
Be direct, but do that without asking questions that can come off as offensive. You might shoot yourself in the foot by opening with touchy questions, like who they plan to vote for — you might get swiped right! Be direct in how you want to move to the next step. If you’re not getting any reply or feedback, move on to the next person.
4. Less texting, more talking
Texting for too long can dampen the chemistry and make it less exciting to meet up in real life. You can video chat to bring both of you closer, and make use of the power of technology to bring your online date feel more natural.
With video chat or in-person meet-ups, you could make use of the power of talking face-to-face. Most men might feel insecure when it comes to sexy voices — women usually have the advantage. If you’re a guy, try to focus on making eye contact, actively listening, or go for that dashing smile.
5. Let your pictures show the real you
The majority of successful Tinder dates are a result of great pictures. But don’t start sending anything racy or obvious. Your pictures reflect your maturity level, and they say a lot about you.
Don’t use pictures from more than three or four years ago — that’s kind of false advertisement. Instead, use more recent social media pictures with the most likes. Or try sending a sweet picture of you and your pet. It can be a great conversation starter.
6. Don’t ask for nudes
This is a pretty obvious no-no, but we find a lot of people doing it, especially on social media — from thread to DMs. Just because you want to see your match in the buff doesn’t mean the feeling is mutual.
Asking for inappropriate pictures is rude and offensive, and so is sending them unprompted. Just don’t do it. That’s not the image you’re trying to project by approaching them in the first place.
7. Don’t make the discussion all about you
A lot of people love to ramble on and on about themselves and forget the other person has a life too. If that’s not bad flirting, I don’t know what is. Leave a little to be discovered about yourself to keep them wanting more.
Be patient and listen when they talk about themselves and don’t interrupt when you find out you both share a common interest in a particular subject. Remember, flirting safely on Tinder is all about the long-game.
8. Focus on their personality
Flirting never feels more genuine than when you focus on your Tinder match’s personality traits. Compliment them just like you would their physical features. Instead, make them feel special for the person they are, not just how they look. Trust me, they’ll love it.
You’re Worth Talking To
These tips should kick your Tinder game up a notch. Just remember, at the heart of flirting safely is learning to be yourself. When you love who you are, you command more respect and give it to others. When you respect yourself, you’ll make smart decisions. You can flirt confidently and focus on having a good time.