Romance

How To Date Someone With Trust Issues And Prove To Them You Are Reliable

It's no secret that toxic relationships can be devastating. It's usually a wise decision to stay single for a while after experiencing one. However, even if you take time for yourself, you may still struggle with trust issues if you were severely hurt by an ex. If you're dating someone who's struggling to trust, there are things you can do to support them.

1. Remember That They Can't Easily Be Changed

Trust issues stem from deep emotional pain. While being kind to your partner is important, it won't fix the underlying problem. They need to work on healing themselves, which is a long process. If you truly care about them, be patient and understanding. But if you don't think you can handle it, it's okay to be honest about your feelings.

Advertisement

2. Don't Take It Personally

It's crucial to understand that their trust issues are not your fault. It's easy to feel guilty and blame yourself, but this only makes the situation worse. If your partner tells you "it's not you, it's me," believe them. Don't try to take responsibility for something you didn't cause.

3. Listen To Them About Their Fears

If your partner has trust issues, they may be hesitant to open up. When they do, it's important to listen without interrupting or trying to relate your own experiences. The more they can share with you, the easier it will be for them to trust you. Just make sure to keep their feelings private and not discuss them with others.

Advertisement

4. Keep Your Promises

If you promise to hang out with someone over the weekend, make sure you follow through and don't be late. It's important to stay true to your word and prioritize their feelings. Consistently flaking on them may make them question your honesty and sincerity.

5. Be Open With Your Cell Phone

It's natural to feel protective of your phone and uncomfortable with others reading your conversations, even innocent ones. However, being overly secretive or anxious when your partner sees a notification may create unnecessary suspicion. If you're not hiding anything, try to relax and be more open to alleviate their concerns and build trust.

Advertisement

6. Don't Get Offended If They Want To Take Things Slow

The labels "boyfriend" or "girlfriend" can intensify emotions and make things feel more significant. If your partner is hesitant to make things official, it may be due to their trust issues rather than a lack of interest. If you care about them, being patient can help to build a stronger foundation for the relationship.

Advertisement

7. Encourage Them To Block Their Ex Entirely

It is possible that the relationship involved a significant amount of abuse. Continually seeing their ex on social media may exacerbate their pain. They may have avoided blocking their ex due to lingering emotions or fear. However, suggesting that it might be beneficial to permanently block them can communicate your support for their well-being and reassure them that they can safely move forward with their life.

Advertisement

8. Be The One To Plan Fun Activities

Ensure that dating remains enjoyable by creating plenty of fun memories together. These will serve as a reminder of the positive aspects of your relationship. It's possible that as you age, you'll have less time and energy to go out and explore the town, so make the most of your time together now.

9. Don't Shrug Off Therapy

A few years ago, suggesting that someone needed to see a therapist was considered an insult. Nowadays, there's less stigma attached to it, and going to therapy is beneficial for several reasons. If your partner suggests it, be supportive. If you've been together for a long time and they're still struggling with trust issues, you might even suggest going together.

Advertisement

10. Leave Your Negativity Behind

It can be challenging to maintain a positive outlook on life every day. However, negativity tends to breed more negativity. If you're always down in the dumps, your partner won't feel connected to you, putting additional strain on the relationship. People enjoy being around positive individuals, so if you make an effort to adopt a "glass half full" mentality, your partner will feel more secure in your company. Additionally, optimistic individuals often achieve more in life, making it a worthwhile goal to pursue.

Advertisement

11. Be Sympathetic

There may be days when you feel like telling your partner to simply "get over it." However, it's crucial to remember that their feelings are valid, and there's a reason they have a guarded heart. While you have every right to feel frustrated, keep in mind that your partner has endured a great deal of pain and trauma. Trust issues aren't enjoyable for them; they're merely the result of an unhealthy relationship in their past.

Advertisement