You know those people who simply light up the room. Yeah, I hate them as well. But the thing is that you don’t have to be the ray of freaking sunshine to be likable. And it implies more approachable, in dating and in creating other relationships.
Being charismatic comes naturally for a few lucky ones. The rest of us have to work on improving ourselves. It’s not the introvert/extrovert thing. You can have a quiet, shy nature and still be adored. It’s about that star quality or whatever you want to call it.
So, let’s see what we can change to represent ourselves a bit better.
Listen without prejudice
I’m not quoting George Michael’s album, but listening, genuinely listening to what’s the other person is telling you, is quite appealing.
People like to talk about themselves, and by not judging them, you’re getting to know them better. With time, they won’t be afraid to show you their true self, and that’s how you form a bond.
Plus, those same people will tell the others that you’re a great person, which by proxy will make you more likable, even though you might have a resting bitch face.
Stop complaining and comparing
If someone says: “I have a headache,” you’re not helping by talking about how your head felt like a balloon just a few days ago. Show some empathy, and give advice, if possible.
Still, don’t just give any advice. You won’t score likability points by becoming know it all.
So, back to the headache situation. Ask the follow-up questions, such as “perhaps you should eat something” or “did you try taking some magnesium?” you’re not sticking your nose into someone else’s business, but being proactive.
And when you meet someone, refrain from telling your family history of illnesses. Do talk, but your love life should stay private. And talking crap about your boss won’t make you cooler. So, no gossip, and less complaining will do wonders for your likability factor.
Connect by sharing interests
Yes, it’s vital to avoid politics and even conspiracy theories. Because you never know whether you just met someone important for your career, yet they believe the earth is flat.
However, there’s a lot to talk about regarding pets, fashion, ways to relieve stress, the weather, redecorating. Avoiding politics and religion is the safest way to skip the uncomfortable and lose potential friends.
Remember that you’re not merely improving your likability. You’re also learning to deal with people, which will further save you from annoyances. So, becoming likable is a win-win situation both for your social life, as well as for your mind!
Now go and practice. And smile more, but don’t force it.