How To Ask A Guy If We're Dating Exclusively (10 Examples)

Navigating the dating world can be challenging, especially when it comes to dating multiple partners before settling into an exclusive relationship. However, if you have found someone special and wants to take things to the next level, it can be difficult to gauge their level of interest. Asking directly can be daunting, as it may risk scaring them away. Here are some tips for approaching this situation.


When inquiring about exclusivity with a guy, you can take either a direct or a subtle approach. Both options have their pros and cons and we will discuss them both along with multiple questions that will help guide you in the conversation.

Just Ask Him

A straightforward approach to determining exclusivity is to ask your guy directly. This approach demonstrates your level of commitment and helps to avoid confusion. Here are five questions you can ask to clarify your status:

As we've been dating for a period of time, can you confirm if we are exclusive at this point?

Are you seeing other people? Am I able to continue dating other individuals?

What is our current relationship status? Are we committed to each other or seeing other people as well?

May I inform my friends that we are exclusive at this point?

My parents have been curious about the exclusivity of our relationship. Can you confirm if we are exclusive?

Asking your parents about your exclusivity status with your guy is not always necessary but it can be a good option if you're feeling uncomfortable about asking him directly. This approach can put some distance between you and your guy and might not be entirely honest. Use this approach only if you're feeling uncomfortable, and pay attention to his reaction when you do ask.

Change the subject away from exclusivity.

Avoid answering the question or saying that you should already know his feelings about exclusivity.

Provide a vague or confusing response, making it difficult to understand his position on exclusivity.

Become angry or upset with you for asking about exclusivity, or accuse you of pressuring him too much with your questions?

If your guy reacts in any of these ways, it could indicate that he is unsure about exclusivity. Some men may know that they want to be exclusive, but struggle with making a decision. They may not want to feel "trapped" or have "options" open, yet they still choose to date only you. It may require patience to navigate this situation, but it is important to consider if it is worth it for you.

Be Subtle About It

If you prefer a more subtle approach to determining exclusivity, consider using these five questions. They will give you a better understanding of his perspective and force him to explain his position. This can help you to have a clear idea of what to expect. Choose the right moment to ask one or more of these questions to find out if you are dating exclusively.

How is your dating life going?

Are you interested in doing something fun just the two of us?

When is the optimal time to begin exclusively dating someone?

What is your opinion on open relationships?

Would it bother you if I continued to date other individuals?

The challenge with this method is striking a balance between revealing enough and not revealing too much about your interest. Asking about open relationships or dating other people prematurely can lead to misunderstandings. Timing and phrasing are key.

For example, if you know someone who is in an open relationship and is having difficulty with it, inquire about it, and express that it is not something you want for yourself. Similarly, when asking about dating other people, phrase it in a way that conveys your lack of interest in continuing to do so. You can ask if you should delete your dating profiles for instance.


There is no definitive answer to this question as it varies from person to person. Some individuals may choose to become exclusive after the first date, while others may take more time. Navigating the dating scene can be challenging as it often involves balancing the needs and expectations of both parties to avoid disappointment.

It's best to take a flexible approach when dating someone. If they're talking about exclusivity early on, they may be moving too fast for some, but it may be perfect for others. Pay attention to how he treats you, if he enjoys spending time with you and if he finds excuses to hang out, he may already consider you exclusive.

It's important to keep in mind that some men may assume exclusivity when dating, thinking their interest is obvious. This is not always the case and it may lead to confusion. However, there are steps you can take to better understand the situation. This can be further discussed in the next section.


It can be difficult for men to express their desire for exclusivity directly. They may avoid the topic or seem uncertain. Instead, they may convey their interest through actions, assuming they speak for themselves. However, it can be easy to misinterpret these actions. But, you can be sure that your guy wants exclusivity if:

He Starts Scheduling Trips With You

If a man is planning trips with you in the future, it's likely that he is considering moving the relationship to the next level.

He Likes PDA

Does your partner engage in physical affection such as rubbing your back, kissing you on the lips, holding hands or similar public displays of affection? If yes, it's an indication that he wants to maintain an exclusive relationship.

He Talks About Your Future

Plans for holiday adventures with family, talks about buying a house, or even mentioning a wedding are clear indicators that he wants an exclusive relationship.

He Tells You He Quit Dating Apps

If your partner unexpectedly tells you that he has deleted his dating apps, it's a sign that he wants to be exclusive with you. It's a way of showing that you have his full commitment and attention.

These signs indicate that your partner is ready for an exclusive relationship. However, there are other things to consider such as, if he invites you to his place, lets you stay for days, cooks with you, talks about introducing you to his parents, and constantly finds excuses to be with you, it's likely that he is ready for exclusivity.

You Deserve an Answer to This Question

When dating someone, it's important to have clarity on the exclusivity of the relationship. Knowing this can make your dating situation clearer and prevent you from wasting time in a non-exclusive relationship. It's important to consider the timing and approach when asking about exclusivity. If your partner is evasive or unclear in their response, it may be time to consider finding someone else.