How To Ask A Guy How Tall He Is Without Being Rude (8 Examples To Find Out His Height)

In the realm of online dating, we often face some common challenges: men believing pictures of dead fish are charming, bizarre messages, and GUYS WHO OMIT THEIR HEIGHT FROM THEIR PROFILE.

Continue reading to explore some subtle (and some not-so-subtle) methods for finding out his height without giving the impression of being impolite.


Does It Run In The Family?

I have come across profiles of guys that include photos of their families. I find it a little odd, but I presume it's because many men don't enjoy taking a lot of pictures of themselves.

Here's how you can utilize this to your advantage:

"Wow, is your family really tall or is the photo deceiving me?"

"Awesome! I bet basketball games at your house were quite intense, right?"

Lead With The Assumption

This approach might seem presumptuous, but you can initiate the conversation by making a comment on his height. If he agrees, he's probably tall! If he contradicts you, then you have your answer.

Here's how you start it:

"Hello, tall glass of water"

Or, you could opt for a humorous line like: "What's the weather like up there?"

Just Come Right Out With It!

Come on, he's aware that we need this information, so isn't it a given that he's anticipating this question at some point?

If you're not certain of his height and really want to know, one straightforward way is to simply ask. What have you got to lose? A Tinder match? There will always be more if he doesn't take it well.

Approach it with self-awareness: "I recently went on a date with someone who was 5'1" and I regret not asking beforehand. Would I be rude if I inquire about your height?"

Or, simply be direct. A straightforward "Hey, how tall are you?" will certainly work.

Ask About Your Mutuals

If you're matching with people in your vicinity, it's likely that you know someone who knows someone who knows this guy. There are 2 ways to go about it.

Submit a photo of him to your group chat and allow the detectives to carry out their investigation. Someone might be able to uncover the information without requiring you to take any actions.

Inquire if you have any mutual friends and mention who you usually socialize with. If there is a shared acquaintance, reach out to them and request information about his height.

"I noticed that you attend basement shows frequently! Have you had the opportunity to perform with Susie Derkins? One of my friends is their guitarist."

"You seem to have a strong connection to the local yoga community. Have you encountered an instructor named Theresa? She is a good friend of mine."

Tell Him You Are Vertically Challenged

This technique can be considered as a way to expose him. By disclosing your height, he will most likely reciprocate in some way.

Gently probe by saying something like "I'm so short that I have to climb up on the counter to reach my cups, can you assist me with that?"

Alternatively, try "Gosh, I recently returned from a concert and my view was blocked the entire time by tall individuals. Being 5'2" can be difficult at times. Do you ever face this issue?"

Blame It On The Pet

This approach has been useful for me as I have a dog that gets scared by tall strangers. Blaming it on the dog is too convenient.

If you have a planned meeting, inform him that your dog/cat/bird/lizard gets frightened by tall people. If he says it won't be a problem, then maybe consider canceling the date.

This is how I would proceed:

"Hi, I would love to hang out at my house, but my dog gets nervous around tall guys initially. If you are very tall, maybe we should go to a different place tonight and you can meet him at a later time."

"If you visit my house, my dog might need extra time to get used to you if you're really tall. Please let me know and I'll prepare him to meet you!"

Ask If He's Comfortable On Airplanes

Although this technique is very specific, it will give you a good idea of the length of his legs. As travel is a current topic on dating apps, it's easy to incorporate the conversation in a subtle manner.

If you're in a similar situation, it could look something like this:

"I'm only 5'7" and the person in front of me is practically pressing their seat into my knees. Do you face this issue as well?"

Ask Him What His Type Is

If the person is polite, they will reply with a standard response and ask you the same question. This prompts you to resort to the classic "tall, dark, and handsome" saying.

Their answer will reveal everything you need to know! If they reply with "I've got two out of three," it's a safe bet they're not tall.

I'd suggest only making lighthearted comments such as "tall, dark, and handsome" or "tall drink of water."


Although I don't think it's necessary, some guys may take offense. If height is important to you and it's not listed on their profile, and you're worried about their reaction, you can always look for visual clues. Are they standing in a doorway in their photos? Standard doorways are around 80 inches or 6.6 feet tall. How close are they to the top of the doorway? Keep an eye out for those things!


As someone who is of above-average height, my perspective on what constitutes a tall guy may be somewhat strict. In my view, 5'8"-5'11" is average, and 5'11" and above is tall. However, there is such a thing as too tall, anything over 6'3" is just too much. They can still be incredibly attractive, but it can be intimidating.