People don't end up in the hands of narcissists because they enjoy suffering at the hands of these disturbed souls.
And if you look closely at your life, you have probably been in a relationship with a narcissist at one point or another.
Heck, Your Parents Might Be Narcissists.
The point is, you have probably met a narcissist you were keen to keep in your life for some mysterious reason.
But why is that? Shouldn't we let go of these people as soon as we realize who they are?
Granted, this might be a little hard with our own flesh and blood. But what about other narcissists?
What Makes It So Hard To Let Go Of Narcissists?
These people are full of themselves. They always crave attention. They always manipulate. All they do is cause pain and suffering.
But sadly, science says they draw in more people than everyone else.
In a way, that means you should not be so hard on yourself for being attracted to them. It's practically the norm, and here's why.
1. They Know How To Make A Good First Impression
When you meet someone and they make such a good first impression, you are highly likely to try to make it work with them afterward. You will wonder how someone so full of charisma, charm, and positive energy could change so much.
Your admiration for them makes you blind to who they really are. However, nobody can pretend forever. Sooner or later, we start to feel that they are not who they want us to think they are. The problem is that we rarely heed this voice of truth, and that's how we end up getting hurt.
2. They Know How To Market Themselves
Narcissists can't survive without admiration, and they know how to get it. They know how to give you impressions of themselves that will leave you interested in what they can offer next.
They have mastered the art of appearing bold and charming, and that's the trick they use to get you to ignore their true obnoxious traits. That is why they can go to a lot of lengths to make you feel special.
3. Their Self-Esteem Isn't Real
Narcissists know how to project the right image of themselves and appear confident in everything they do. The illusion that these people have high self-esteem is irresistible to many of us.
Having confidence is highly regarded in our society, and people who have it are considered to have many other positive traits. But the truth is that they don't have high self-esteem, just a lot of narcissism. Their confident demeanor is a way to overcompensate for that.
4. They Know The Manipulation Game
If a follow-up was done on the person who invented manipulation, a narcissist would probably be the culprit. Narcissists are all about manipulating their subjects to gain an upper hand. To them, a relationship is a game, and there have to be winners and losers. They can never lose.
What blinds most people to this reality is that narcissists want and even need relationships. But not for the same reasons as everyone else. They always need a victim. That is also why their relationships never last because they have to move on as soon as their target sees them for whom they are.
And so, if you thought spotting a narcissist is easy, think again. These people know how to put on a show to win you over. But if you look past the charade, you will see them for the egotistical manipulators they are and keep a safe distance. So, stop judging people based on their charisma and you will have a better chance of sidestepping the trap narcissists set for their gullible victims.