how do you tell if the guy you’re dating is married?

Dating someone new is an exciting part of life. The butterflies in your stomach, the new experiences, and the honeymoon phase are all normal parts of a budding relationship. However, when the excitement starts to die down a little, you may find yourself wondering about your boyfriend. Is he truly this amazing, or is he married to someone else with a whole other life on the side? We have compiled a list of signs that you should watch out for that indicate he might have a spouse.

Protective Over Their Phone

In a typical relationship, it is common for someone to know their partner’s phone password, even if they never use it. If your boyfriend is a married man, he is likely very protective over his phone and keeps it close by him at all times. If he freaks out at the thought of you even touching it, this could be a red flag.

Elusive With Information

Married guys like to keep the conversation on a need-to-know basis. He likely does not discuss personal details about his childhood, job, or hobbies. He will be focussing on things that are happening at the moment and wanting to know more about you instead.

Refuses To Go Public

You might find that your boyfriend does not want to introduce you to his friends or family members. If he does introduce you to someone, it is as his friend, rather than as his girlfriend. If you have him as a friend on social media, he may refuse to share any photos or posts of the two of you.

Meets Up At Strange Times

Coordinating schedules can be difficult, even if when one partner is not trying to sneak out and avoid their wife. Noticing a pattern of only meeting up late at night or sporadically during the month may be a sign that he spends the rest of his time with his wife and family.

What should you do about your partner’s deception? Once you have put the pieces together, it is time for you to take action.

Run A Background Check

If you decide to conduct a background check on your boyfriend, you may be able to find out if he has been hiding a wife in his life. Background checks are great ways to source information about a person, as you will have access to all the data that is publicly available about them. Many companies will do the searching for you in exchange for a small fee. This search will help you identify his known relatives and verify your suspicions.

Confront Him

When you discover the truth, you have the option of confronting him. A recommendation is that you do this over the phone or with a trusted companion. Doing so will reduce the chance that he can harm or manipulate you. Let him know that his scheme is over, and you do not want to deal with his lies anymore. Confronting him about his deception will be a cathartic experience for you and the first step in moving on.

Give Yourself Time For Sadness

Depending on how long or serious the relationship was, this will doubtless be a difficult process for you to go through. Give yourself the time that you need to mourn. You can do this step either by yourself or with friends/loved ones. Spend a few days doing some things that you enjoy and just resting yourself.

It is important not to remain at this step for too long, or else you will start to languish. Give yourself a set date to pick yourself back up and stick to it. Ask someone to keep you accountable.

Write Down Your Feelings

Writing is a therapeutic exercise that can help people get over difficult experiences. By organizing your thoughts on paper, you can start to untangle your mind. You may even find that the breakup was a relief in some way, and you can move forward.

Rekindle Old Hobbies

This is the time where you should focus on reconnecting with yourself. Go back to the hobbies that you once loved but then did not have time for. Choose a night for all your girlfriends to get together and catch up. When you start feeling great about yourself, this will help in the recovery process.

During this period, try to avoid immediately jumping into a new relationship. It may seem like a tempting thought to help with the loneliness, but it can cause lasting harm if you are not ready to date again. Eventually, you will return to your old self, and you may want to delve into a relationship or stay single. The freedom of choice is yours!