Help The Other Person

Help The Other Person

There are several stages in relationships, so if you're looking for a way to keep the magic alive, here's something that might help.

Reality kills most relationships. Not because life is so dark and unpleasant, but because when you're in love, you tend to wear those rose-tinted glasses. But let's start from the very beginning. You might understand your exes better and avoid mistakes this time around.

I believe when I fall in love

When you're falling in love, you're not yourself. Even science says that you act like you're high. You want that person to be happy, yet you are acting more possessive than usual. You're borderline obsessing, staring at them, and yet, you're full of energy.

There's a whole chemical reaction your body's going through. The bottom line is that falling in love is an insane, mesmerizing feeling. You idealize that special someone, and the world stops.

The excitement of the first date

Now that you got your crush's attention, you're about to start a journey. It's a fairytale, with roses and unicorns and butterflies. Most people find you two to be quite disgusting. Always showing PDA and not being able to stay apart for more than a few minutes.

While that seems ideal, what happens next will either break your heart or break your illusion. The choice is really up to you and your partner. Will you live moderately happily ever after? Or will you choose to head to a heartbreak hotel?

And the gloves are off

After a while, life begins again. You start getting into a routine, and you have to pay attention to your family, friends, work. You're still in love, but something's changed. You no longer find everything they do adorable and you want some alone time. You need it, and so does your partner, but you're afraid to say anything.

Instead of pretending that everything is in full bloom, it's time to see if you and your partner really have a future. Yes, life's happening now, but you're not giving your heart to someone based on lust and passion. You need more. They need more. And it's time to find out if you two were a good match.

Love is more than a feeling

Real love is honest, sincere, and full of compromises. You have to respect each other, grow together, be ready to let your guard down. And you have to demand the same from your partner. It sounds like a lot because it is.

What started as a romance of a lifetime now looks like a questionary from some old magazine. Do you have the same goals? Where do you want to live? Oh, and what about all the little things you find annoying? Did they put the toilet seat down? And hey, what about kids and pets? Where do you really stand?

The ultimate test

When you're in love, you start imitating that person. No, that's not creepy. That's merely human nature. As time passes by, you start coming back to yourself. You're you, and the other person isn't the same. That's terrifying, but we are always changing, adapting, and you either accept each other or don't.

If you feel safe and joyful most of the time, there's hope. Eventually, we are all settling because the person of our dreams is no longer the same. Can you live with that? Can you openly and friendly talk about the changes in your relationship?

Nothing lasts forever

No one can promise you happily ever after. However, you can find new excitements and explore your relationship further. Nurture your relationship, but don't forget to love yourself because you don't need to end up bitter and alone.

You are always guiding your partner. And they are doing the same for you. It's like the blind leading the blind, yet, if you have enough reasons, you will manage to pull through. It will look like a business arrangement at times, and you will wonder what if you chose someone else. But you didn't. As long as they listen, respect and honor you, and there are still some sparks, you should be grateful for making the right choice.