There are a lot of terrible things human beings can do to each other, and ghosting would clearly be up there if a list were to be put together.
And no, I am not exaggerating. I know that failing to get closure is a lot worse than being told that you are not loved anymore and that someone no longer wants you in their life.
But I could be wrong.
After all, there was a time I considered being loved no more was the worst thing that could happen to anyone. But that is before I learned more about ghosting.
Before social media became an indispensable part of our culture, life was as real as it got. You saw people in person, not as highly edited pictures with a lot of filters.
People meant what they said.
How beautiful these days were!
Honesty was considered a virtue, and humility was common. Real values took precedence in life, and people had respect for each other.
Above all things, people took responsibility for their actions, because they grew up knowing to treat others as they would like others to treat them.
People valued accountability in that they could accept responsibility and own up to their actions. People felt obliged to explain their actions, good or bad.
So, if anything went wrong, the least someone could do would be at least try to offer an explanation. People also had the dignity to keep their promises and were also willing to explain why things might have changed and why the initial plan or expectations were no longer achievable.
But this important approach towards life is slowly dying.
It happens, and I totally understand – the person you thought was right for you could turn out to be just a frog, and just another step you have to pass through on your way towards your perfect match.
At other times, you make mistakes. You think you can handle an emotional commitment but then discover well into the relationship that you were never ready at all.
These things happen to the best of us, and there is nothing to be ashamed about here.
But walking out of someone's life without a word is just terrible. It is one of the cruelest things you can do because you leave this person in emotional agony while you are busy enjoying a peaceful life elsewhere.
People who do this should get a slap in the face!
I get it that words hurt, but honesty and openness will not be as devastating as ghosting is.
Ghosting is the ultimate show of cowardice. Few things hurt like being ghosted.
We can do a better job at being respectful of other people. We can be compassionate to others. We can try to understand them and stop pretending to be emotionless creatures. The apathy has risen to new levels, and it is ruining us.
What we need is the courage to tell someone the truth, even if it hurts them.
Life is sometimes hard, but that does not give you an excuse to destroy other people's peace of mind and cause them untold emotional suffering.
With a bit of effort, the ghosting habit can stop.
So guys, we seriously need to stop ghosting each other. It's not cool.