Am I a people-pleaser? To some extent, yes. This is evident in my desire to avoid confrontation whenever I can. But being a peacemaker has its downsides. For one thing, people treat me as a doormat, and it’s wearing on me.
1. I’ve Always Been A Pushover
In my attempts to avoid getting on anyone’s bad side, I have had to take a lot of crap from people. I am naturally kind-hearted, and some people try to use that to their benefit at my expense. In many cases, I don’t resist that as putting up with it seems the easier option. Time and again, I let people get away with telling me things that ruined my mood.
2. People-pleasing become too much of a burden for me
Trying to make people happy all the damn time can be draining. Frankly, it is an impossible task. You have to pretend that you see, feel, and do things a certain way in order to appease those around you. I have stood by as people said bad things about people I genuinely liked. I let people pass on their bad moods on to me. That started to tire me out.
3. I’ve had enough drama
I once got a job position somewhere, and they said their main goal was positivity. I had never felt so alive because my true happy nature was revealed. It felt really good being around such people. After the experience, there was no going back. I made up my mind to be surrounded by positive people all the time. I was no longer going to let people make me feel bad just because they were in a bad mood.
4. Some people had to go
I had to face some harsh truths about my life. And that truth was that some people did not belong in it. These people were always making me feel worse. They were too toxic, and all they did was make me feel bad about everything. At heart, I am an empath. That means I have to stay away from disturbed minds that always make me feel bad about myself.
5. Imade use of the Facebook unfollow button
I have to admit, the thought of unfollowing or unfriending someone on Facebook seemed pretty drastic and mean. And even now, I can say that unfriending someone is not a walk in the park for me. But luckily, the platform has an unfollow button that allows me to avoid getting updates from people who always have something negative to say. I don’t mind people sharing pictures of their latest meals, or their newborns, but I will not suffer through negative posts that bring me down any longer.
6. Family is no exception
It is not just people who get into your life after meeting them that can ruin the positive vibes you carry around you, but family members as well. Some family members are chronic gossipers, and they will suck all life out of you in minutes through their mindless banter. I don’t care if they are blood or not, such people have no place in my life.
7. No, it no longer bothers me
There was a time I would feel guilty for cutting someone off from my life for the negativity they brought into it. But that is no longer the case. I no longer feel like an evil person for doing what I have to do by avoiding conversations or any other kinds of interactions with people who have nothing positive to add to my life.
8. It’s self-empowerment, not selfishness
I know some people think people who can do what I do are selfish. But that is the farthest thing from the truth. I should make choices that are good for me, and that is what I am doing by staying away from people who make my life worse. This is the only way I can maintain my mental health and avoid all the negativity that dogged me wherever I went.