Published in Oct 2020 / Updated in Mar 2021
Rudeness is a behavior that goes beyond the parameters of normal and accepted behavior, which is why people who encounter rudeness feel disrespected. Folks have come to blows and held grudges over this kind of behavior, which is why it’s important to familiarize yourself with some of its forms.
You see, anyone can be rude. Even people who do their best to be polite can be rude without even knowing it.
In fact, some forms of “politeness” are in essence just types of rudeness. Saying “no, thank you” to that offer from a new friend might be taken as a sign that you don’t think too much of what they have to offer.
So, this is a delicate subject; and knowing these types of rudeness will help you avoid offending people without even knowing it.
If you are one of those people who believe in “saying it as it is,” there is a good chance you are a repeat offender on this one. There are situations where being sensitive is more important than being right.
When your friend loses their job over their bad temper, and they come to you for moral support, that might not be the right time to tell them they had it coming.
That might be the brutal and honest truth, but it might cost you a friendship. Saying or doing things that hurt other people’s feelings at a time when they need someone to lift their spirits is very insensitive and rude.
If you want people to be sensitive to your needs, you should be sensitive to theirs as well. Otherwise, you will attract lots of disrespect and rudeness as well, and that’s no picnic.
2. Lack Of Consideration
When someone proves that they have no consideration for you and your needs, you feel disrespected. We can’t always deliver on our promises, and we, therefore, need someone to understand that.
That’s what consideration is all about.
When you meet someone unwilling to put themselves in your shoes, you feel they are rude and disrespectful. As far as they are concerned, they might be doing what is necessary under the circumstances.
But for someone who genuinely needs to be understood, it’s humiliating and disrespectful.
Obviously, if your boss gives you a hard time for missing work when you were unwell, you will feel hurt. It’s rude and disrespectful to be that inconsiderate.
Similarly, don’t disrupt others when they are in the middle of an important presentation. Imagine yourself in the same situation: you would obviously not appreciate such behavior from anyone.
A little kindness goes a long way. It costs nothing to be polite, but it hurts plenty to be impolite.
People don’t have to notice your politeness, but when they realize you are being impolite, then you are definitely being rude and disrespectful.
Lack of good manners is considered impolite, and some people take that pretty seriously. For instance, in some cultures, it’s impolite to greet an older person a certain way. You might be considered ill-mannered and rude as a result.
When someone does you a favor, failure to show appreciation is a form of impoliteness. Such a reputation can make people less willing to help you out because you will look ungrateful.
So, when talking on the phone, use a reasonable voice. Also, avoid making inappropriate jokes or selectively greeting people when you meet them.
Obscene language and acts can be very rude and disrespectful to people. They not only reflect badly on you but also on anyone who associates with you.
Having a reputation for obscene language is also a sure way to deny yourself opportunities to form very good relationships with amazing people.
So, stop cussing all the time. Avoid crude jokes and other obscene things. At work, such things have held many people back or even cost them their careers.
The rudeness that comes in form of obscenity is not quickly forgotten or easily forgiven. So, be careful not to have a reputation for obscene language or behavior. This can be suicide for your love life.
5. Being Offensive
For some strange reason, some folks consider lewd behavior humorous. While it can get you the attention and a few laughs, it can also rub lots of people the wrong way.
In such cases, continuing to use such words is obviously very rude and disrespectful. Many people feel uncomfortable around people who use offensive language, even if it does not necessarily involve dirty words.
So, learn to speak in a way that makes people comfortable around you. If people are easily offended by your manner of speaking, then that’s something you can try working on.
Don’t delude yourself into thinking that your love for the truth is what offends people. There are ways to package any message, so it does not make people irritated by you.
People who offend people are often rude people.
6. Violating Boundaries
Everything has a limit, and there are restrictions on how far you should go when interacting with some people.
If someone does not like talking about their personal issues, asking them about it would be crossing the line and downright rude.
Unwelcome sexual advances also fall under this type of rudeness, and so does making threats.
So, what’s the lesson here?
There is clearly a long list of things that constitute disrespectful behavior. I believe the above list of disrespectful behaviors clearly proves this fact.
Effects of disrespectful behavior include confrontation, broken relationships, and lots of other challenges in life. For instance, disrespectful behavior at work can even hamper career progress.
It is, for this reason, we think so seriously of the psychology of rude behavior. Disrespectful communication will hold you back wherever you go.
So, as much as you possibly can, avoid rude and disrespectful behavior wherever you go. Yes, even when the person totally deserves it. The way you treat others says more about you than it does about them. Always remember that.