If eyes are windows to the soul, then it's not hard to understand that eye contact is bonding, without using words. But, what makes us react so strongly to something so familiar? And how does it relate to attraction?
Eye contact is a powerful way to make nonverbal communication. It says that you understand, you're listening and you're present. Similarly, any eye movement can cause distress and even arguments with another person.
Even worse, when you're not looking at someone in the eye, people tend to think you're not telling the truth. So, it's a fundamental skill, and since it's a skill, you have to master it.
It will improve your love and work life, and make others see you in a better light.
It's a social skill
Maintaining eye contact is a vital skill, but it's also part of our DNA. While it's harder for men, for women holding a gaze comes more naturally.
Still, it's a skill, and if someone is looking at you directly, you get the feeling of magnetism. It's because you feel special, and yet, the other person seems to be the confident and determined one.
According to scientists from MIT, increased eye contact makes you seem more appealing, honest, likable, dominant, and warm. Why?
We tend to follow eyes, not the human head, and many years ago, it meant the difference between life and death. We're talking about our caveman ancestors. They used their eyes to try to communicate and survive.
You can improve your primal instincts by practicing. Instead of looking at the mirror, what you need to do, is work on your self-esteem. It's not a simple task, but one of the things that will improve with your confidence in the way people see you, and that's why you should start with some self-love.
If you're anxious in social situations, some may find you odd, even deceitful, and one of the reasons is that you're not comfortable talking face to face.
But, similarly, some will see the fear in your eyes, and be compassionate. It truly depends on who's looking and what the person wants to see.
Looking someone in the eyes is an intimate moment. Fear of rejection is another reason why you might not be able to maintain it. No matter how hard you try to look cool on the outside, holding someone's gaze comes from the inside.
Eye contact and emotions
If you think someone is lying or being dishonest with you, you can stare them down. It sounds like a plot from a sitcom, but it's the truth.
Eye contact is a powerful tool, and you can test this theory the next time you think someone's not telling the truth or trying to trick you.
Apart from a winning smile, eyes are the ones creating the attraction. We've all been there: your eyes meet across the room, and the world stops for a few seconds. There are poems and love songs that testify that a modest gaze is what we tend to call love at first sight.
Maintaining eye contact can give you professional advantages as well. Your bosses will see you as a person of trust, someone dedicated and a real asset to the company.
Yes, it's all based on the simple fact that you can talk and look people in the eye without looking like you're trying to scare them.
Though we don't think about it as much, eyes are more than just one of our senses. They show how we feel when we're enjoying ourselves when we're falling in love.
Our gaze can make other people go through various emotions, from shame and guilt to warmth and approval.
So, how do you know if a person's faking their eye connection? Don't think about the length, but about the quality of your eye contact. You cannot fake it, because it's something we've been carrying with us since before we knew how to make fire.
Again, see it for yourself, try to pretend you're interested, stare all you want. The person will see through you, though you need someone very straightforward to call you out on your faking.
It's in your eyes
When it comes to attraction, there are several levels of unintentional and conscious glances. Eye contact is vital in seduction, and once again, it's almost like a staring contest.
Let's get back to love at first sight, which is a more accurately sexual desire in the form of a different primal instinct.
You flirt with your eyes; in fact, many people can confirm that their love stories started when their eyes met. Now, if you have a dog, you know they will look away first, to let you know you're their boss.
The same thing happens to all of us, while we're playing the game of seduction. The one who moves eyes first is intimidated!
When your eyes meet in a gaze, it's time to put on a gentle smile. It's a way of letting the other person know that you see them, you want them as well.
Though it's all sounds rather simple, the eyes are a dead giveaway when you're face to face with your crush. Your pupils expand, and there's science behind it as well.
Your brain gets a boost of feel-good chemicals when you're sexually or romantically attracted to someone.
This rush in hormones appears to make your pupils dilate. If someone wants to know how you feel, they won't be able to tell via texts, but one good look at your pupils and you're busted!
Eye contact will make you a winner
We take pride in our education, our looks, but what we fail to realize is the power of body language.
And one, if not the essential part of "speaking without saying a word," a.k.a. nonverbal communication is eye contact. There's nothing left to say that improving your eye game will make your life better in more ways than one.
More than that, you will seem like a kinder person, especially once you master the look of a helpful stranger. Now, if only it were that easy to improve our confidence and nail this whole face to face and eye to eye thing...