You may approach every relationship with a sense of skepticism towards men, and it's understandable given past experiences. You fear the possibility of a toxic man camouflaging himself as a decent member of society. But don't worry, his true nature will eventually surface, and you need to be attentive to spot the warning signs. To avoid wasting your time on him, here's how you can identify a toxic guy from the start.
1. He wants nudes
A guy who asks for naked pictures when you've just met is undoubtedly toxic. Such behavior is disrespectful and indicates a lack of intelligence. Even celebrities with high security measures have had their private photos leaked. Trusting this person with your explicit photos on an unsecured device is out of the question. A clear no is the appropriate response.
2. He never makes concrete plans
If he never suggests a specific day, time, or place to hang out, it's a clear indication that he doesn't care about seeing you. He's likely preoccupied with other women and has no time for you. Even if he tells you to contact him when you're free, it's merely a facade to make himself appear interested. He wants to keep you as an option in case his other plans fall through.
3. He texts you randomly
If he regularly contacts you on weeknights but disappears on weekends, it's a clear sign of toxic behavior. When he's bored, he'll ask about your day, but when he's happy and having fun, he'll disappear, which is the most obvious sign of his inconsistency. An inconsistent man is incredibly irritating, or in this case, a man-child.
4. Everything he says sounds rehearsed
He speaks like he's quoting a self-help book, saying things like, "I've been working on myself for the last year, and now I'm ready to give love a chance." It's difficult to decipher his true intentions. In reality, he's probably just enjoying the sound of his own voice. He's likely a narcissist who believes that everything he says is charming, which is a classic trait of a toxic guy.
5. He flirts by sexting
His idea of courting is sending you inappropriate messages at midnight. He never just says "hey," but rather includes a pet name and tacky emojis like the devil, tongue, and water splashes. If he frequently contacts you after hours, it's because he's only interested in you for one thing, and you know what that means.
6. He's got too many "friends"
It's hard to determine if he's genuinely single. While he may not be in an exclusive relationship, it's uncertain how many hookup partners he has. It's evident that his Snapchat score is excessively high, and he has multiple girls commenting on his Instagram posts. Additionally, every picture he posts shows him surrounded by females. It's safe to say that something is suspicious about his behavior.
7. He "doesn't believe in titles"
Just because he doesn't believe in titles, it doesn't mean they don't exist. He's aware of their existence but doesn't want to use them. His excuse of being too busy with work or school or being afraid of commitment is not valid. In reality, he just wants to have multiple sexual partners. It's best to run away from such toxic behavior.
8. He can't hold his liquor
If he's the drunk guy at the bar who spills his drink on everyone he talks to, he likely has toxic tendencies. He's stuck in his college phase and goes out with his squad every weeknight. He uses alcohol and sex to avoid adult responsibilities, indicating that he may suffer from Peter Pan syndrome. Seeking therapy could benefit him greatly.
9. His jokes are inappropriate
While you appreciate a good joke, he tends to take things too far. You've heard him use derogatory terms like "fatties," "sluts," and even the "c" word to describe other women. Although he has never called you names directly, his behavior towards others shows his lack of respect and empathy. This combination of disrespect and lack of control can be dangerous.
10. He doesn't have answers
He has a hard time giving a straightforward answer to even the simplest question. Whether you ask if he likes your dress or if he wants to grab a drink, he always manages to deflect the question and turn it around on you. It's frustrating and makes you wonder what he's hiding. This is a classic tactic of a toxic guy who doesn't want to reveal his true intentions or feelings.
11. His friends know too much
He's a toxic guy, and you can tell by the way he and his friends gossip about sex stuff. He airs out his sexual history, and if his friends know intimate details about the girls he's slept with, then they're bound to know the same details about you. For him, sex is just a trophy that he brags about to his friends for a while before putting it on a display shelf and eventually forgetting about it.