Do Not Be The Crazy Girl — 6 Things To Remember When Texting

Texting can be tricky, as one wrong move can make you seem like the crazy one. But since it's 2022, you've had enough practice to avoid any missteps. Here are six key things to keep in mind while texting the guy you're interested in dating, to ensure a smooth conversation.

1. The longer your texts, the crazier/needier/more high-maintenance you seem

Since men prefer brief messages, it's advisable to keep your texts short and sweet when getting to know a guy. Avoid rambling on like you would with your girlfriends, as it can overwhelm a man's brain and push him away. Edit your texts carefully before sending them to avoid coming across as the "crazy girl."

2. Keep the text ratio even

It's best to maintain a balance of one text for every text a guy sends, and if he doesn't respond, avoid sending follow-up texts in the hope of a reply. Sending multiple texts can make you appear desperate and won't yield satisfying results. Instead, focus on yourself, spend time with friends, seek support, and wait to see what happens. Avoid sending multiple texts as it can make you look like the "crazy girl" - the last thing you want.

3. Text-bombing will always leave you feeling pathetic

It's easy to lose our cool and become the "crazy girl" when a guy doesn't reply to our texts. We may bombard him with fake cool or angry messages, only to receive a nonchalant response hours later, leaving us feeling foolish. The lesson here is to avoid text-bombing at all costs, as it's nearly impossible to recover from.

4. Nothing good comes from text-fighting, ever

Avoid using text as a medium for serious conversations or providing feedback to guys. It's best to save these discussions for when you're together in person. If you're not comfortable saying it face-to-face, then it's probably not worth saying at all. Texting about these topics is likely to end poorly and make you appear dramatic and unstable. Take a step back from the phone and spare yourself the trouble.

5. Nice girls finish last

Whether on-screen or off-screen, it's essential not to be an over-pleaser who responds to every text with a smiley face. Guys need space to chase you, so it's crucial to create some distance. Don't assume that showering him with attention and adoration is what he wants because guys are wired differently. They enjoy chasing, not being chased. So, take your time to respond to his texts, and don't worry about being seen as a game player or a bitch. By doing so, you're giving him what he needs and avoiding the "crazy girl" behavior.

6. Mundane texts are useless

Sending a text to check in with a picture of your freshly painted toes after a mani/pedi may seem cute, but unless he has a foot fetish, it's unlikely he'll care. Texting should be used to keep things interesting when interacting with a guy. While it's not the worst thing to send little texts about your activities, it doesn't add much to the chemistry either. It's important to create tension and mystery so that he can chase you. Being constantly available either in person or on his phone screen won't allow him to chase you. Instead of being the crazy girl, try to keep your texts short and sweet.

How To Keep Texting From Turning You Into A Crazy Girl

1. Remember that texting is supposed to be fun

If texting is causing you to become the crazy girl who frets, fixates, and anguishes over every single text she sends, you may be approaching it incorrectly. It's merely a message, not a marriage proposal, so relax. As the licensed marriage and family therapist Morgan Goulet, LMFT, points out, "You have time to consider what you want to say and there isn't the added stress of looking someone in the eyes."

2. Use emojis strategically

Using emojis in your text messages can add some fun and playfulness, but be careful not to rely on them too heavily. Using too many emojis can make you seem like you're not capable of having a proper conversation, and it can make you come across as the crazy girl who thinks she's being funny by communicating only in emojis. So, use them sparingly and remember that they should complement your message, not replace it entirely.

3. Think about what you're trying to say before texting

Before sending multiple texts, ask yourself why you want to reach out. Are you trying to build a friendship or just being curious? Licensed therapist Alicia Muñoz suggests being clear about your motives to avoid acting like the crazy girl.

4. Put your damn phone down

Putting your phone down is a simple yet effective way to avoid being perceived as the crazy girl. You don't have to be glued to your device all the time, and it's actually better if you're not. To break this fixation, try stepping away from your phone and engaging with the real world. Read a book, grab a coffee, or meet up with friends. Interacting with the world around you can provide valuable perspective and help you communicate in a calmer manner.