Lifestyle

Divorced Man Wants To Know If He Is Wrong For Making Daughters Share A Room

On Reddit, a man who had recently divorced wondered if he was at fault for having his daughter share a bedroom with him in a small apartment, due to his new living circumstances.

Aita For Saying My Girls Need To Start Adapting To Sharing A Room?

The impact of divorce is not limited to the couple; it can also affect their children.

The Redditor in question has been grappling with various issues after their divorce, with the latest being whether or not their daughters should share a bedroom in their new apartment.

According to his account, they initially shared a house and took turns leaving the premises when it was the other person's turn to spend time with their children.

"My wife and I are in the process of getting a divorce. We have 2 daughters that are 14 & 11. Initially, we were trying the whole, one of us stays there one week then the other while renting an apartment."

However, this arrangement soon became complicated.

"This was to keep the children in one home and have minimal disruption. However, it just wasn't working out, for any of us but especially the girls."

At this point, the husband made the decision to move out completely.

"We decided I would get my own place and my wife would keep the house, with the girls alternating between us every other week."

Due to the high rental prices, he was only able to secure a small apartment at that time.

"At the house, my girls each have their own room. I tried to find a place that had 3 bedrooms but they were out of my price range. At this time, I can't afford to buy a house, so I'm renting."

He opted to let the girls share the bigger bedroom.

"I found a decently sized apartment and decided my girls could take the master bedroom as it's bigger and would fit 2 beds. I got a divider and tried to make it so they'd each have some privacy."

However, the fighting between the girls became excessive.

"They hate it and I understand. It's not what they're used to and they are very different. There is a lot of bickering. We've had this arrangement for a couple of months now. I've tried my best to keep the peace. I told them hopefully by next year they'll have a bigger place."

The ex-partner was also unhappy with the situation and offered her opinion, suggesting that the father move to the living room instead.

"My wife has been shaming me for forcing them to share a room. She says I should sleep in the living room. One, it's not big enough for a pull-out or air mattress."

"Two, I really do not think this is a big deal in the grand scheme of things. I shared a room growing up and was it fun? No. But it was the situation."

The original poster (OP) discussed the issue with his children, but his ex-wife advised him to handle the arguing.

"I told my girls that I sympathize and I understand it's hard but they do have to adapt. My wife says I should put up with the complaining."

Therefore, he turned to Reddit to inquire if he was at fault for making his daughters share a room.

"AITA for expecting them to start adapting vs complaining every single day? I've accommodated them as best I can (the divider, letting them decorate their respective side as they want, letting one go in my room if they need a breather from the other, etc) but at this point, it's time to start learning to adapt. AITA?"

The Redditors responded with sensible advice, stating that the opinion of the ex-partner was no longer relevant.

"NTA."

"One great thing about divorce: she's entitled to have an opinion, but it's just that, her opinion... YOU can do whatever the heck you like within reason."

"...And having them share a room due to financial constraints is entirely reasonable."

Another added, "NTA."
"Your STBX is stirring the pot with your daughters. She needs to stop with the comments about your daughters sharing a room. Her comments are keeping them upset, and prolonging this situation."

"Ex can mind her own business. You have made a reasonable accommodation.
NTA"