Clever Response: Wife's Brilliant Reply To Husband's Divorce Letter

Clever Response: Wife's Brilliant Reply To Husband's Divorce Letter

Falling in love with someone can be a real journey. Many of us believe we deserve long-lasting love, but that's not always how it works out. The truth is, things don't always go as planned, and relationships can break apart, whether it's after a month or even a decade.

Once upon a time, a husband made a tough call to end his 7-year marriage with his wife. Instead of opting for a face-to-face conversation, he believed a divorce letter would be the way to go. Little did he know that this choice would come back to haunt him, as his wife's response taught him a lesson he'd carry with him forever.

Check out the divorce letter that the husband sent to his wife. While we can't guarantee its authenticity, it's still pretty impressive if it's real.

Husband Decides The Best Way To Go About A Divorce Would Be Through A Divorce Letter

"Dear wife,

I'm writing you this letter to tell you that I'm leaving you for good. I've been a good man to you in our 7 years of marriage & I have nothing to show for it. These last 2 weeks have been tough for me. Your boss notified me that you quit your job today & that was just too much to bear any longer. Last week, you came home & didn't even notice I had a new haircut, had cooked your favorite meal & even wore a brand new pair of silk boxers. You ate in 2 minutes, & went straight to sleep after watching all of your soaps. You don't tell me you love me anymore and you don't want sex or anything that connects us as husband & wife.

Either you're cheating on me or you don't love me anymore; whatever the case, It's over and I am leaving.

Your Ex-Husband

P.S. don't try to find me. Your Sister & I are moving away to West Virginia together! Have a great life!"

No matter the circumstances, there was absolutely no justification for crafting such a spiteful divorce letter. And you might wonder, why should the soon-to-be ex-wife simply let it go? Well, she decided to respond with a letter of her own, and let me tell you, it was both uproariously funny and quite humiliating for her soon-to-be ex-husband.

"Dear Ex-Husband,

Believe me, nothing has made my day more than receiving your letter. It's definitely true that you & I have been married for the past 7 years, although a good man is a far cry from what you've been. I watch my TV shows so much because they drown out your constant whining & griping, although that doesn't seem to work. I definitely noticed your haircut last week, but the 1st thing that came to mind was 'You look just like a girl!' And since my mother raised me not to say anything if you can't say something nice, I decided not to comment.

And when you cooked my favorite meal, you must have gotten me confused with MY SISTER, because I stopped eating pork 7 long years ago.

About those new silk boxers: I turned away from you because the $49.99 price tag was still on them, & I prayed it was a coincidence that my sister had just borrowed $50 from me that morning.

After all of this, I still loved you & felt we could make this work. So when I hit the lotto for 10 million dollars, I quit my job & bought us 2 tickets to Jamaica. But when I got home you were gone.

Everything happens for a reason, I guess. I hope you have the fulfilling life you always wanted. My lawyer said that the letter you wrote ensures you won't get a dime from me. So take care.

Signed, Your Ex-Wife, Rich As Hell & Free!

P.S. I don't know if I ever told you this, but my sister Carla was born Carl. I hope that's not a problem!"

Oh, snap! It seems like the ex-husband might be regretting his decision now. On the flip side, there's speculation that he might be involved with his ex-wife's sister. This whole situation is brimming with drama waiting to unfold. And let's be real, doesn't it all sound a bit too coincidental? The ex-wife wins the Lotto on the very day he sends her a divorce letter. Moreover, what kind of marriage is so icy that they don't even communicate face-to-face and resort to letter-writing instead? Lastly, who on earth is the ex-wife sending her letter to? Her ex-husband doesn't live with her anymore! The plot thickens!

Clever Response: Wife's Brilliant Reply To Husband's Divorce Letter

The Internet Talk About The Ridiculous Divorces They Have Handled

It's fascinating how not all divorces are finalized through the use of divorce letters. Some self-proclaimed divorce lawyers have shared some utterly absurd cases they've encountered. Here are a handful of standout ones that popped up on Reddit:

1. "I had a couple arguing for three hours over who got the kids on Christmas day, only to discover at the end that they were both Jewish," wrote user u/msc2436.

2. u/ammjh mentioned, "Took the couple two hours to decide who would get the groceries left in the fridge. Estimated value of the groceries was around $40. Two hours of my time, opposing counsel time, and mediator time added up to about $1,000. It all came down to a Costco/Sam's Club-sized jar of peanut butter. (Who keeps peanut butter in the fridge?!)"

3. u/spacefunky quipped, "My dad was a divorce attorney for some time. He said people would argue over $150 patio furniture for hours on end at a $300/hour rate (each side). It's not about the patio furniture, it's about sending a message to your immature of an ex-husband/wife."

4. u/TheNightWitch had an interesting story told to her by one of her lawyer boyfriends. "I dated a divorce lawyer and my favorite story from his work was the man who was super pissed that the division of assets was 50/50 and that his wife's lawyer had a forensic accountant who found his multiple offshore money stashes. In retaliation, he demanded half the dog. Not joint custody. Half of the dog, who was his wife's much beloved, very spoiled little buddy. He burned through thousands of dollars of legal fees just to make her cry, by demanding that the dog be put to sleep and its ashes split, 50/50. People are delightful!"

5. u/JournalofFailure mentioned, "I had a case where the estranged wife was calling my client's employer repeatedly, accusing him of theft and other white-collar crimes, [in an attempt] to get my client fired. The thing is, the children were with her, and she was also demanding child support. Which is based on his income. For the job from which she was trying to get him fired. (Fortunately, the employer was onto her BS and my client wasn't let go.)"

6. u/FattyBinz wrote, "I was in a mediation where it took the couple an hour and a half to split their personal property, retirement accounts, real property, and custody of their six-month-old son. The rest of the day, about four hours, was spent arguing about how to split the time with the dog. For the kid they just put, 'as agreed upon by the parties' but the dog had a strict calendar working out holidays and strict pickup/drop-off times. I was ashamed to be a part of that unbelievable display."