Chasing Someone Who Doesn't Want You Back Is Ruining Your Life — Here's Why You Need To Stop


Being in a one-sided relationship can be emotionally devastating. You are investing your time and energy into someone who is not reciprocating your feelings. Unfortunately, many people find themselves in this situation and remain hopeful that their love interest will eventually come around. However, waiting for someone who is not interested may be detrimental to your well-being. It's important to recognize when it's time to move on.

1. You're leaving a swinging door open for them to walk in and out of your life

Love can leave you vulnerable, as you open your heart to another person and risk potential heartbreak. When you love someone deeply, you may be willing to overlook your own boundaries and allow them to come and go as they please. This can lead to a pattern of behavior where they take advantage of your forgiveness and willingness to take them back.

2. You're investing in a romanticized relationship rather than an actual romantic relationship

While it's enjoyable to fantasize about romantic dates, lazy mornings in bed, and reconciling after fights, these fantasies are incomplete without a willing partner. In reality, if you're the only one investing your time, emotions, and energy, it's not really a relationship. It's important to acknowledge this truth and move forward accordingly.

3. Because you're focused on getting their attention, you may be missing out on a chance with someone else who actually cares about you

When you're in love, it's easy to become single-minded and focused on winning over the person you desire. However, this approach may be detrimental if the other person does not share your feelings. By fixating solely on them, you may miss out on potential opportunities with someone who is interested in you. It's essential to remain open to other signals and possibilities in order to find a fulfilling and mutually loving relationship.

4. You overthink every interaction, thinking that it's a sign

Small gestures like taking your coffee order, holding doors, or asking about your sick dog are chivalrous and kind, but they do not necessarily indicate romantic interest. It's important not to confuse kindness with flirtation, as doing so can lead to false assumptions and disappointment. This is a common and potentially harmful mistake that should be avoided.

5. You start to wonder if there's something wrong with you

Remember, it's not about you, it's about them. It's easy to fall into the trap of self-doubt when we don't get what we want. However, the idea that changing yourself to become the person your love interest desires is not a healthy approach. If you find yourself feeling this way, it's a sign that something is amiss, and it's important to re-evaluate the situation.

6. Your feelings are so intense that you start to lose yourself

Unrequited love goes beyond just having a crush. If it were merely a crush, you wouldn't remain fixated on this person for so long. When you are truly in love with someone, you care about them deeply and prioritize their needs over your own. You may be willing to sacrifice sleep or other obligations to be there for them at any time. Even if they do not reciprocate your feelings, they remain the most significant thing in your world.

7. You're ruining your existing relationship with them because you're forcing it to be something more

Trying to push a relationship beyond its current boundaries, whether it be with an acquaintance, co-worker, or best friend, can put the existing relationship at risk. By persistently pursuing a romantic connection, you may inadvertently damage what you already have. Your efforts to get closer may end up pushing the person further away, resulting in less rather than more in the relationship.

8. You'll always be waiting for a moment that will never come

Regardless of their relationship status, location, or language, chasing an unrequited love is a persistent hope that the universe will eventually bring you together. Even when faced with rationality and truth, it is impossible to erase one's feelings for them, leaving you waiting for a perfect moment that may never come.

9. This relationship will start to affect all the others in your life

Just like being ditched by a friend who enters a new relationship, obsessing over a one-sided love can lead to neglecting the people around you. Constantly thinking and talking about the person of your dreams can hinder engagement in conversations and make you overlook the people you're with. When they don't show up, stalking them on social media can further distance you from the relationships you already have. All this, for a one-sided relationship that may never happen.