Nice guys often feel overlooked in the dating world, but what should you do when you start to suspect a nice guy may be too nice? Trust your intuition, and pay attention to these 15 subtle signs to avoid a potentially stifling situation.
1. He Gives You His Exact Address
I mean the exact unit number, not just the general neighborhood or block. Unless he is your Uber driver, there is no valid reason for this level of detail to be brought up in conversation.
2. He Makes Future Plans To See You The Next Day, The Next, And The Next
When you have just met someone, you should consider it as a date-by-date basis until further notice. It is an at-will relationship on a probationary period that either party can end at any time. Maintaining space is important for a healthy relationship.
3. He Pushes You To Cancel Plans You Had Before Meeting Him To Make Time For Him
If you two were already free to hang out, it may be just out of convenience. However, if he asks you to cancel a previous commitment so you can spend time with him, be cautious.
4. He Leaves A Personal Item Of His With You
It can be considered flirtatious when a woman does this, but it's important to remember it's a tactic. When you go out with a guy, you have the right to approve a second meeting. You don't want to feel pressured into making plans on his behalf.
5. He Signs Himself Up To Help You With Something You Need
While the gesture may be appreciated, these are actions typically taken by a boyfriend. It's too presumptuous before having a clear relationship status or even knowing if there will be future communication.
6. He Asks If He Can Pick You Up
It is always important to have a plan for an emergency call on a first date. It provides an option for leaving the date early if it does not go well. This is a sign that the person is trying to control your time, which is not healthy.
7. He Tells You It's His Birthday
It's unusual for a person you just met to expect you to make plans for a special day. You are not obligated to make a big effort for someone you are still getting to know and evaluating for a potential future together.
8. He's Too Eager About Liking All The Same Things You Do
Sharing common interests is positive, but it becomes suspicious when you hear "me too" after everything you mention. It raises the question if he is truly listening or just trying to convince you that you are better off as friends than romantic partners. Compatibility should come naturally, not be forced.
9. He Talks Too Much About Himself And Doesn't Seem To Notice You're Not Getting A Word In
If he believes the date was successful after this type of behavior, it could indicate a lack of understanding of boundaries. He might talk over you, through you, down to you, or just to you, rather than engaging with you in a respectful and equal manner.
10. He Inserts Himself Into Your Holiday Plans Far In Advance
Major holidays like Thanksgiving and Christmas are typically reserved for spending time with family. Unless we have established a committed relationship, it is unlikely that you will be joining me for family gatherings such as sharing a meal with my aunt. It's important for him to keep that expectation in check until the relationship has progressed to that level.
11. He Insists On Following You To Make Sure You Get Home Safe
Walking you to your car is a polite gesture, but if there is no threat of danger, it is not clear why he would follow behind your vehicle. It could be an indication that he is trying to find out where you live. If you plan to end communication with him after a poor date, you do not want to risk him showing up at your home to ask why.
12. He Tries To Start A Full Conversation With You After You Get Home From The Date
If you haven't already scheduled a second date before saying goodbye, there could be an uncomfortable silence while waiting for the next move. After confirming that you arrived home safely and eliminating any fear of rejection, it's time for him to say goodnight and move on. If he calls you and initiates a new conversation after the end of the date, it could indicate difficulty with letting go of people.
13. You Wake Up To 65,000 Text Messages From Him The Next Day
It's important to note that this behavior was exhibited by a woman. However, if you encounter a man who behaves in a similar way, it is advisable to contact law enforcement, the FBI, and possibly even the Witness Protection Program immediately.