Badass Women Often Struggle Even In A Healthy Relationship
Published in Dec 2018 / Updated in Oct 2021
A badass woman is strong, independent, and seems to be making it in life. She is the envy of others around her. To add to the success, she has found herself a partner, a good one for that matter. However, why do many of us women in this situation still struggle to enjoy the satisfaction that comes with a healthy relationship? Here are the key reasons as to why:
We take love seriously without taking shortcuts
We work hard to appreciate and maintain our relationships. Be it family, friends, spouses, or potential partners. Because of this, we give more to the relationship just to see it succeed. Unfortunately, if we don't get the same in return, we feel that the other party is taking us for granted.
We stand out
Being an achiever means that you have something extra to offer. This is why we stand out in many areas of our lives. The same case applies to a relationship where we strive to be better than the rest. Regrettably, when on top of our game, we normally feel isolated since many people can't keep up with us. We also feel that we are getting a raw end of the deal due to the higher standards we've set.
We work extra hard
Just like in our daily life, we take a relationship seriously. We will put in extra hours to see that it takes off and we struggle harder to ensure it remains stable. However, after putting in so much time and effort and not achieving the desired results, we become disappointed. In fact, we may end up blaming our self or even begin developing self-doubt.
We think ahead
To achieve the perfect relationship, we will think about the future— Where we are heading in the relationship, what it takes to get to the next level, the likely risks, threats ahead, and so on. This may be a good strategy for a solid relationship, but it may be a little obstructive as it may prevent us from enjoying the moment.
We believe that other people are equally good
Our perception of a relationship, like other things, is that other people are as good as we are. With this thinking, we expect our partners to be like us. Sadly, we soon realize that our partner isn't like us and they may seem a little slow, laid back, or not too focused. This doesn't mean that he/she isn't serious about the relationship. However, because of our notion, we feel let down or become discontented.
We are problem solvers
Badass women are naturally problem solvers. They will pick small things that seem like a threat or will spend a good amount of time and effort analyzing and re-analyzing a possible problem. The urge to fix problems may force us into trying to change a person yet he/she isn't willing to change. The end result- disappointment.
We love perfection
Just like in our lives, our relationship has to be perfect. True love, no shortcuts, maximum pleasure, satisfaction, and no flaws. However, high chances are that our partner will not be as perfect as we'd like. He may not let out his emotions to the full and may not be the "lovey-dovey" type, yet he is very much into you. Being human, we tend to make mistakes and are all wired differently. Therefore, in our eyes, sometimes the not-so-perfect partner may be a disappointment.
We are very specific
Badass women already know what they want in a partner before they have met them.
We have a clue on the physique, social status, financial standing, emotional aspects, and so on. With such specifics, it's very easy to write off a potential partner or start picking mistakes early in a relationship. We become upset by small things that don't seem to fit our bill.
Our imaginations are wild
Women like us strongly believe in fantasies and a fairy tale kind of life. Prince charming riding on a white horse wearing shiny armor will come and sweep us off our feet. Sadly, real-life and fairy worlds are two worlds apart. Finding the prince charming or the perfect partner is a long shot and we are disappointed more often than not.
We do not look at a relationship like work
While we put in extra effort in different sectors of our lives including taking care of our home, family, work, and education, many of us look at our relationship a bit differently. We think it requires lesser effort and has fewer demands. However, with the pressure of maintaining a long-lasting commitment, offering maximum attention and support to your partner, or sacrificing time and effort to a relationship, how can a relationship not be work? In fact, many badass women realize that it's more demanding than their 9-5 job.