When thinking about a certain guy, you have started to feel all warm and fuzzy inside. Every time you see him, your heart skips a beat. It’s official, you are crushing hard.
Blinded by love, all you can think is: am I just a friend to him? Stop picking petals – there are better ways to tell if he loves you or loves you not.
Let’s look at the facts and find out if thinks of you only as a friend.
1. You only hang out in groups
When we like someone in a special way, spending time alone with them sounds like a dream. A guy with a crush on you would do anything for a one-on-one outing.
If the two of you always meet when others are around, he probably sees you as a friend. This is especially true if you have known each other for a while.
Whenever you ask him to hang out he suggests extending the invitation to other friends? He likes you enough to want you in his life but doesn’t really see you as a partner.
2. He never texts you first
Think about the way you communicate: is it always you texting him first? It’s likely, then, that you are not on his mind a lot.
Sure, some people are just bad at texting. Stay assured, though, that someone in love would get in touch – by call, email, pigeon post, whatever.
When weeks can go by without a word from him, it doesn’t look like budding love.
3. He is always “too busy” to meet
Raise your hand if you never used “I’m busy” as an excuse to say no to something.
Granted, we all have frantic lives these days. We surely keep making time for what matters most, though.
A busy life would hardly get in the way of seeing his love interest. If he never finds a couple of hours to catch up, you are probably not his top priority.
4. He gives or asks you for dating advice
What reasonable guy would talk about people he fancies with a potential partner? Unless he is teasing you to see a reaction, he clearly just sees you as a friend.
In general, asking for advice about another romantic interest is a clear sign. His head and heart are engaged somewhere else.
At the same time, encouraging you to see other people also leaves little room for doubts. He cares about you as a friend, so he would be happy to see you with someone great.
5. It bothers him when people assume you are together
When people ask if you guys are a couple, he denies it in the blink of an eye. Maybe he also looks uncomfortable or awkward.
In other words, he doesn’t seem to like the idea. This should give a clear answer to “am I just a friend to him?” – most likely, yes.
A man who is into you would smile, or blush, or check to see your reaction. On the other hand, a record-speed denial doesn’t look promising.
6. He treats you like one of his friends
There is a thin but clear line between feeling comfortable with you and seeing you as one of his bros. When a guy is a bit too cozy around you, chances are he considers you as one of his pals.
Being his authentic self around you is one thing. Burping, farting, and cursing in your presence is a whole other playground.
For sure, that doesn’t look like a guy trying to win you over…
7. He does not return compliments
Smitten as you are, you can’t help saying nice things about him all the time. However, all you get in return is an awkward “thanks” before he quickly changes the subject.
If he were into you, he would light up at your compliments. Not only that, he would return them and find ways to make you feel special, too.
Between you, compliments travel on a one-way road? He doesn’t want to lead you on because he doesn’t feel the same way about you.
8. He keeps clear boundaries
Next to someone we like, it can be hard to keep our hands off them. Leaning closer or softly touching their arm comes instinctively.
Keeping a respectful distance, without getting closer or leaning towards you, says a lot about his feelings. Someone avoiding even casual touch is unlikely to see you as more than a friend.
In other words, if he doesn’t look like he is craving to touch you, he most likely isn’t.
9. He has never made a move
Let’s face it: you guys have known each other for years, and he never once mentioned being more than friends. That speaks volumes, no matter how shy and insecure he is.
If you had a special place in his heart, he would have made a move at some point.
Of course, things can change, feelings can develop… but don’t hold your breath.
10. You have a gut feeling
In time, you might have noticed some of these signs already. Your heart still hopes, but your intuition is telling you to let go.
While we can’t trust gut feelings all the time, we should not dismiss them too quickly. Sometimes, they tell us something we already know but fear to admit.
After all, you are the one who knows him. If deep inside you feel like there is no hope, maybe it is time to move on.
11. He said you are just a friend to him
Has he told you he sees you as a friend, or maybe a sister? You can safely take him at face value on that.
Even if he mentioned it as a joke, there is almost certainly some truth in it. The guy might be trying to turn you down without hurting your feelings.
Am I just a friend to him? Just ask!
You checked all the signs, you read all the articles, and you still don’t know what to think. You are losing your sleep over this guy.
The answer is as simple as it is scary: just ask him.
Of course, it’s terrifying. There is no best way to clear all your doubts and move on, whatever the answer is.
He loves me not: what now?
Heartbreak sucks. Take your time and, if meeting is too painful, take a break from seeing him.
Your love might be unrequited, but a good friend is not less precious than a partner. In time, as your heart heals, you can learn to appreciate the value of your platonic relationship with your guy friend.
Don’t just stick around in the hope he’ll eventually fall for you, though. It would not be fair to him and will end up hurting you more.
If letting go of your romantic feelings seems impossible, parting ways could be the best decision. As you free some space in your heart, happiness could find you when you least expect it.