Being able to rely on your partner and seek their help is a sign of a strong, healthy relationship. However, even in the most comfortable and confident love, self-reliance is still an essential part of life. It is wise not to depend on your partner for everything, regardless of the relationship's strength.
1. Self-Worth
When you start a new relationship, it's normal to experience an ego boost. However, your confidence and positive self-image should be something that you cultivate within yourself. Depending on someone else to maintain and provide your self-esteem is unfair and places a lot of pressure on your partner. Furthermore, your sense of self-worth must come from within if you want it to remain consistently high.
2. Making Major (And Even Minor) Decisions
The distinction between seeking your partner's advice on a decision and relying on them to make it for you is enormous. It's crucial to have the autonomy to make final decisions independently. If you consistently rely on your partner to make choices, it may damage your relationship if the result doesn't meet your expectations. Additionally, we must all take responsibility for our choices, actions, and consequences in our lives and maintain control over them.
3. Defining Their Identity
When individuals engage in long-term relationships, they tend to lose their personal identities and develop a combined identity with their partners. However, preserving your own interests, passions, and objectives is crucial for your happiness and future. Regardless of the level of intimacy and connection with your significant other, it is essential to maintain your unique traits and preferences instead of blending into a single entity.
4. Taking Care Of Their Personal Responsibilities
It is normal to seek assistance from your partner on occasion when you require aid with something. However, it is not appropriate to depend entirely on your partner for critical responsibilities, such as caring for a pet you adopted before meeting them. If you took on the responsibility, it is your responsibility to fulfill it primarily.
5. Providing Complete Financial Support
Although it is a different scenario if you have a family together and stay at home with the children while your spouse works, intelligent individuals do not rely on anyone, including their significant other, for financial support. Being financially self-sufficient provides complete freedom and prevents placing undue strain on the relationship. While dividing bills and expenses based on the higher salary is acceptable, you should be able to support yourself financially when necessary.
6. Finding Solutions For Any And All Problems
Taking initiative and solving problems independently are essential aspects of being self-sufficient. It's not reasonable to assume that your partner can handle every difficulty or predicament alone. In an ideal relationship, both partners should work together to address problems and find solutions. Nevertheless, developing problem-solving skills on your own is a crucial ability that will enhance your self-esteem.
7. All Of Their Productivity And Downtime Plans
In a long-term relationship, it's effortless to adopt your partner's routines and plans for free time. However, balance and compromise are critical in this aspect of a relationship. If you depend on your partner to alleviate boredom or plan productive activities, you'll feel aimless and isolated when they're not around. Being able to make independent plans and engage in activities solo will ensure that you don't lose your individuality.
8. Fighting All Of Their Battles
It is essential for your partner to support and defend you, but this does not mean that you should lose your ability to stand up for yourself in any circumstance. Whether it is a minor issue, such as sending back an overcooked steak at a restaurant, or a major one, like confronting a toxic boss, it is crucial to your self-sufficiency and independence to fight your own battles and assert yourself when someone treats you unfairly or poorly.
9. Their Own Happiness
Depending on anything other than yourself, especially another person, for happiness will always be unpredictable and short-lived. Although your partner can bring joy to your life, genuine and lasting happiness must come from within. If you rely on your spouse for your happiness, you will be disappointed and frustrated when you are feeling low. Additionally, having unrealistic expectations for your partner can strain your relationship. It is vital to give yourself the credit and importance you deserve in your own life, and you will be thankful for it.
