Despite what some people may say, engaging in casual sex with a friend with benefits or hookup partner is not inherently wrong. Many women have had satisfying and successful casual relationships that meet the needs of both parties involved. However, while it is perfectly normal to not be interested in a serious commitment, it is important to avoid sleeping with someone who treats you poorly. If your hookup partner begins to exhibit problematic behavior, it may be time to end the arrangement.
1. He Isn't Considerate Of Your Schedule
If a man only wants to see you on his own terms and only reaches out to you during the day when he's bored or at night when he's looking for a hookup, it's best to move on and not contact him again. A guy who doesn't respect your time isn't worth the effort, even if it's just for a casual sexual relationship.
2. He's Always On His Phone When You're Together
Regardless of your relationship status, your partner should prioritize being present and attentive when you're spending time together. It's impolite and discourteous to be preoccupied with your phone during social interactions, whether it's with a friend or a casual partner. It's not unreasonable to expect your partner to keep their phone use to a minimum while you're together, and they should avoid texting or engaging in physical intimacy at the same time.
3. He Doesn't Care About Birth Control
If your partner doesn't bring up the subject of safe sex before getting intimate, it's important to halt any further activities. While it's wise to carry your own protection as an independent and empowered woman, your partner is also responsible for being prepared for safe sex. If they don't take the initiative to discuss or offer protection, it's best to prioritize your well-being and exit the situation. Don't hesitate to take charge of your own sexual health and safety.
4. He Doesn't Inquire About Your Orgasm Or What Makes You Feel Good
If the sex is underwhelming and unsatisfying, it's best to avoid contacting your partner again. If they haven't shown interest in your pleasure or inquired about your preferences, it's a major red flag. It's simply impolite to neglect your partner's needs in the bedroom. While orgasm may not be the sole indicator of sexual success for women, your partner should still make an effort to satisfy you. Sexual intimacy should be mutually enjoyable and fulfilling, not one-sided.
5. He Doesn't Communicate About What Makes Him Feel Good
It's important for your partner to not only inquire about your sexual preferences but also to communicate their own desires. When your partner engages in conversations about sex, it's an encouraging sign that they're comfortable communicating about intimate matters. Communication is a crucial aspect of sexual intimacy, and both partners should feel empowered to express their wants and needs to ensure a mutually fulfilling experience.
6. He Doesn't Do Oral
There are differing opinions on this matter, but personally, I believe that if your partner is not willing to perform oral sex, it may be a sign of selfishness and thoughtlessness. If your partner isn't initiating oral sex, it's important to communicate your desires and observe their reaction. If they respond with excuses such as "it's weird" or "I don't like the taste," it may be an indication that they're not willing to prioritize your pleasure. In this case, you deserve someone who is willing to prioritize your sexual satisfaction and take your desires into consideration.
7. He Doesn't Kiss You After You Perform Oral Sex On Him
There are varying opinions on this matter, but personally, I believe that this could be a significant deal breaker. Whether you're in a casual relationship or not, if your partner is uncomfortable with kissing after receiving oral sex, it's crucial to have an open and honest discussion about their discomfort. If they refuse to communicate or offer an unsatisfactory explanation, it may be best to cut ties with them. After all, if you're willing to perform oral sex, they should be willing to show intimacy by kissing you afterward. It's not unreasonable to expect mutual respect and consideration in a sexual relationship.
8. He Doesn't Let You Sleep Over
While it's ultimately up to you whether or not you want to spend the night, a considerate partner should offer you the option to do so rather than letting you drive or commute home late at night. If your partner isn't willing to accommodate your needs and provide a safe and comfortable sleeping arrangement, it could be an indication that they're not invested in the relationship. Refusing to offer a sleepover could suggest a lack of concern for your well-being and intimacy. If your partner doesn't prioritize your comfort and emotional needs, it may be best to cut ties with them.
9. He Doesn't Offer Breakfast Or At Least Coffee In The Morning
If you decide to spend the night, a respectful partner should at least offer to get you coffee or take you out for breakfast in the morning, particularly if you've spent the entire night with them. This behavior demonstrates basic courtesy and respect, and it's important to only engage in sexual relationships with partners who display such gentlemanly behavior. While these actions may not necessarily indicate that he's in love with you, they do show that he values your time and company.