As this year draws to a close, the excitement of a New Year and new beginnings can bring new hope and inspiring thoughts and dreams.
For some of us, the pain of this year is felt deeply and a deep desire to just simply erase the year on January 1st makes the top of our wish list.
While a good many people will be celebrating a fresh start, for some of us, there is a continuance of what was quite frankly a shit year.
Here are 8 things to say to encourage someone who's ending the year with a heavy heart.
It's okay to not feel okay.
Sometimes giving someone validation goes a long way to helping them work through the pain they feel. Knowing that someone else sees what we have experienced as very real pushes us towards healing. We have a tendency to believe that we have to continually pretend we're alright or put on our brave face to avoid affecting those we love around us, it actually prevents us from truly healing. So be sure to remind those you love that it's perfectly okay to be hurting.
You are not going through this alone.
A simple yet powerful phrase that gives comfort to those that feel alone. Do not make the mistake of saying others are going through your pain too, no one needs to hear that, and far too often once said it makes the person feel that all their thoughts and feeling have just been invalidated. Just tell them that you are there for them and will support them through this harsh time.
You are not a burden.
Often, we feel a burden, we are reluctant to talk about our pain and emotions, as we believe that we should just go through them alone. Tell your loved one that everything is temporary and that the most painful parts of our lives will eventually pass. Remind them that every ending eventually will lead to a new beginning and that there is always hope.
We love you always.
We often forget that when we are battling our own personal hell, there are people in our corner. Make a point of telling them they are loved and that there are those who will go to the end in support to prove they are not alone.
New beginnings are everywhere.
Don't let those you love become overwhelmed by all the New Year and all the making resolutions hype it applies far too much pressure. Talk to them, instead, explain that new beginnings can be done at any time of the year, and that they can choose to begin whenever it feels right, and that they shouldn't feel pressured to rush their healing.
I am inspired by you.
Tell your loved one exactly how they inspire you, it will help lift their spirit, perhaps even stop doubting themselves and see they are worthy and that they have the strength to move on and work through the pain and begin to heal.
There is something good in each day.
Don't only tell them but show them that every day can be a good day. Remind them that there is beauty in even the smallest of things. A good book with a cup of coffee. A walk in the sun. Swimming in the ocean. Give them hope and you will see a difference in them as they begin to heal.
Change begins with one small step.
Talk to them about how change is not an overnight thing. Encourage them how one small change, is in reality, a huge step change to improving their life. Sometimes that's all you can do, and step by step, you get to where you need to be.