No matter how much you tell yourself that it's not right to be like this, you can't help it. You are obsessed with other people's opinions. Here are seven clear signs that it's time for an intervention!
It's in our nature to give a darn about what others think. But, there's a fine line between being self-aware and obsessing over others' opinions. It harms your self-esteem and confidence, plus it takes away the fun from your life. Let's see if you should make some significant changes:
You're A Pleaser
It's ok to respect others, but you live to make other people happy. So much so that you forget the most important person in your life: yourself.
Sometimes you feel guilty for taking care of yourself. You know you shouldn't be, but you can't help yourself: you're a crowd-pleaser.
How about you use that energy and focus on your life and your interests? Think about it.
You're A YES Person
It's annoying, but you can't seem to say "no" to others. Learning to say it will raise your sense of self, but you're most likely wired to keep repeating "yes."
You can't be everything to everyone. If you don't stop saying "yes" to others, you won't grow as a person. The others will move on, and you'll be stuck right in the same place.
You Are Concerned About What Others Have To Say
It's clear: you have a case of fear of criticism, and it's stopping you from living the life you should.
Gossiping and wanting to know what others think of you isn't necessarily bad, but again, there's that fine line between being obsessed and being curious.
You're The Victim
Well, at least you're playing the victim. It's a way of distracting others from seeing your flaws.
You're forcing people to care. And you need approval. But guess what? The more you seek other's consent, the lesser you feel good in your own skin.
You Can't Make Up Your Mind
It's hard to make a decision or listen to your gut. It shouldn't be, but you're trying to read people's minds. And that makes it impossible to be in touch with your feelings and ideas.
While it's good to ask people for some input; eventually, it's your life, so what are you doing?
Healthy relationships are full of emotional boundaries. But when you're obsessing over what others think, you lose that sense.
Do you let a stranger into your apartment? No, so stop letting them into your mind. People matter, but if you're not your own hero, they will walk all over you.
You're Easily Adaptable
Well, being adaptable is a great treat. But, if your personality changes based on others, you have a problem.
While you can't be the same person at the office or while partying, your essence stays the same. Your taste, hobbies, opinions are not cute little outfits. You change daily.
The good news is that you can change yourself and stop caring about what other people think. The bad news is that you need to invest a lot of time into your confidence and discover who you really are. Being a people pleaser, yes, person and social chameleon became part of your nature. Luckily, you can break that vicious circle, just like any other habit.
Make a list of priorities, things that make you joyful, and do things you're afraid of. Face other fears until you get to what scares you the most: what other's say about you!