It is common not to know what to do when you are single, to get confused or lonely. If you've always felt that you need a partner to be happy, then it might be hard for you to figure out enjoying the single life. You are not alone; many people feel a lack of fulfillment when they are not in a relationship.
The truth is, however, that it is essential to be happy alone. This is the first and most important thing you need to do when you are single.
The relationships you have with others reflect the relationship you have with yourself. This cannot be bypassed. If you are not enough for yourself, then how do you expect to be enough for others?
So, as you can see, it's worth working on it and getting to the point where you can live a contented life, even if you're single. Here are some things to do when you are single.
Things To Do When You Are Single And Feel Like You've Been Alone Forever
Some of us spend so much time single that it's hard to believe we'll ever find love.
We can't always help our romantic situation. Some are blessed with the ability to attract just about anyone they put their mind to. Others are doomed to go through life as an awkward mess that feels lonely, hoping someone finds their awkwardness endearing.
These people are also the types who are usually single for a long time or spend a lot of time between relationships. Either they can't find someone they like or don't really know how to find someone suitable. Either way, they end up having a great time living life in Singlesville, just looking across the hedge at the city of couples hoping to one day move in that direction.
Why Being Single Can Be Amazing
However, not everything about being single is a problem. Many complain about it for hours, making it look like torture, but in reality, it can be fantastic if you know how to do it right and what to do when you are single. When you're on your own, you only have one person who you should care about keeping happy.
And that's you. You pretty much do what you want, you go where you want, and you never have to answer to anyone. You can also have so many hobbies in your free time, and order all the appetizers and drinks when you go out because you only pay for them!
Things To Do When You Are Single When You Feel Like You Will Stay Single Forever
Almost everyone wants to find love in their life and someone they can grow old with. However, if you have been single for so long, you feel like you will be single forever.
If you've been single for too long and you're starting to believe you'll be single forever, you can forget all about it. You can do many things that also increase your chances of finding someone who is perfect for you. Here are the 20 things to do when you are single:
Tip No. 1: Focus On Your Freedom
You first need to understand that being solo has an excellent benefit: freedom. That can be a daunting thought for many people. If you've been in a relationship before that has influenced all of your major decisions, a suddenly wide-open world of endless paths can be overwhelming.
Try to appreciate this for what it is. Look at your friends in a couple and notice all the restrictions they often have to deal with. When you are in a relationship, you have the burden not only of being satisfied but caring about the other person's feelings. Those who don't know how to say "no" often turn into people who give too much of themselves.
Even if you know how to set boundaries, being alone and having all the freedom you want can be a relief. It's easier to be single when you realize how many restrictions have been lifted.
Tip No. 2: Think About How Conditioned And Pressured You Are
How much do you want to be in a relationship, and how much does society pressure you? If you lived in a culture where people don't get into romantic relationships, would you mind being free?
Society may have influenced you more than you think. No law of the universe says you have to mate with someone else, get married, make babies, and buy a two-story house. Unfortunately, social pressure can make us seem like a failure if we don't achieve those things.
So, another important thing you must do when you are single is ask yourself: do you hate being single or just don't want to "end up alone"? Do the implications bother you that you may never marry more than reality?
If you really have a specific goal of getting married and having kids, that's great. Do this for your reasons, and keep in mind that despair is unlikely to appeal to a potential spouse.
Tip No. 3: Save Your Time For Yourself
If you are single and not used to it, you will easily subconsciously replace the "duties" of your relationships with duties towards other people. You may also inadvertently create false relationships.
What does that mean? Do you have a friend you're holding on to now? Do you allow your parents or other relatives to monopolize your time?
If you have recently left a relationship, there could be a gaping vacuum of time and effort, especially if it was complicated. Resist the urge to fulfill it with random duties that serve others.
It may seem that these activities will distract you from loneliness, but a lot of time will only prevent you from dealing with the fundamental problem: that you feel unfulfilled when you are alone. This can prevent you from developing your own life purpose.
Among the first things to do when you are single is keep time to yourself. Learn to work with that void and fill it with activities that enrich you. Then you can genuinely serve others out of a sense of sharing and belonging.
Tip No. 4: Allow Yourself To Be Present (especially With New Romantic Interests)
The key to satisfaction is accepting the moment, paying attention to what is happening now, and trying not to fight it.
A lot of resistance to being single happens because of an obsession with the future. "What will happen to me? Will I never get married? Will I die alone?"
While planning for the future is fine, compulsive concern about it is not.
If you're going on a date or looking for a partner in some other way, be open to opportunities. Stay in the moment.
A key thing to do when you are single is not to demand instant commitment from another person. Don't try to push a relationship into an unnaturally fast pace, as if you have some kind of agenda. This way, you will attract desperate people and reject healthy people interested in meeting you first.
Tip No. 5: Find Time To Think
Among things to do when you are single is to learn how to be alone with your thoughts.
Self-reflection is critical. If nothing scares you more than sitting alone, without distractions - without TVs, phones, people - then that's an even bigger reason to do so.
You could say that those of us who feel like we desperately need something, we actually just want a distraction. Some do it to pursue the career they desperately wish, some do it by getting addicted, and some never being alone.
We don't want to be with ourselves because we don't want to face the truth of who we are. It's too hard. It's like staring into the void of random thoughts. Having someone else with us as we face life can be temporarily soothing - but it's just a patch that hides what's underneath.
Learn to sit alone. Learn to meditate. Learn to walk in the wild and be completely happy on your own. Not only will it help you cope better with life, but it will also make you a better partner if one day you are no longer single.
Tip No. 6: Go On A Solo Vacation Somewhere Amazing
If there's one single thing that overshadows the impending doom that you feel you'll have to face singlehood forever, you can take a vacation anywhere and anytime you want.
Instead of wallowing in your misery, here is one of the things to do when you are single: go on a fantastic vacation somewhere you've always wanted to. You never know when you'll land "the one," and you can no longer travel the world as you please.
Tip No. 7: Go Out With Your Friends And Their SOs
Don't refuse an invitation to spend time with friends because they have a partner and you don't. If you isolate yourself from them, you feel even worse.
What you need to do when you are single is to mingle and socialize with other people and spend time bonding.
Tip No. 8: Stop Looking For "The One" And Simply Live Your Life
Most people who think they will be single forever just look to survive every moment they wake up and look for someone to call their own. Stop it!
If you just enjoy the time you have and forget to find that particular person, they will simply stagger into your life anyway. Tip no. 8 is very important to do when you are single - the point of life is to be enjoyed, either alone or with a partner!
Tip No. 9: Joining Clubs Has To Be Among Things To Do When You Are Single
Instead of sitting alone at home all the time, among things you can do when you are single is join a club. In fact, it could be any club, book club, bowling league, or even a painting club.
If you get there and enjoy time with others, you will forget that you are single.
Tip No. 10: Choose A New Hobby
Just as you can join a new club, another thing you can do when you are single is choose a new hobby that will take your time and distract you from the negative feelings of single life.
Start by rollerblading, knitting, or doing something that excites you to get up in the morning.
Tip No. 11: Go To Bars Or Clubs On Your Own
If you feel like you're going to be single forever just because you're the type who never tries to get in a relationship or even meet people, then you need to go out on your own.
Going out is one of the things to do when you are single that you just cannot miss. Just visiting a bar or club helps you meet new people you would never otherwise have a chance to talk to if all your friends surround you.
Tip No. 12: Introduce Yourself To People
Don't just go to a bar and end up sitting down for a martini until that hot boy or girl across the street finally notices you and steps on you. No. It doesn't work that way.
You need to do when you are single is stand there and actually introduce yourself to people, and maybe you will find someone worth your time.
Tip No. 13: Practice Talking To New People
If you're single because you can't put together two sentences when someone attractive approaches you, then you need to practice.
Step in front of a mirror or front of friends and practice what to say to increase your chances of not making fun of yourself.
Tip No. 14: Don't Sit At Home More Than Two Days A Week
I have this huge rule for anyone who thinks they will be single forever. Don't spend more than two nights a week at home alone in the evening. Not only this increases your feelings of loneliness, but that way, you will never meet anyone.
Tip No. 15: Stop Worrying And Focus On Things To Do When You Are Single!
Stop thinking about being single. There is no reason to worry and be sad that you are single, and worrying about it will age you from all the stress on yourself. Just forget about it!
Keep smiling, stay positive, and be optimistic is what you need to do when you are single.
Tip No. 16: Learn To Be Content With Singlehood
Usually, those of us who feel like we have been single forever are not happy with our status. The truth is, you have to learn to love single life before you even dare to find someone to share your life with.
If you don't, you may end up resenting that you didn't enjoy your life any more time before you got into something serious with someone.
Tip No. 17: Stop Stressing
Stress will not help you find someone to spend your life with.
In fact, it will probably only make your condition worse. You can be so stressed that you become very desperate and end up with someone you really don't like at all. Just relax.
So, learning how to stop stressing out is vital among all things to do when you are single.
Tip No. 18: Spend More Time With Family
It's an easy way to be happy with being single - or at least it will help you forget that you are. Spending time with those you love and who love you fills the void you think is missing.
Tip No. 19: Join An Online Dating Service
If you're just really tired of single life and want to get back into the dating world again, join a dating site. There are so many different choices, and it's a fantastic way to meet people you might otherwise never cross paths with.
Tip No. 20: Get A Puppy
You may laugh, but it's so true. If you want to fill the void of someone you can care for and love, but you're single and don't look like that's going to change anytime soon, adopt a puppy! They will give you all the love and attention you need.
When you've been single for a long time, you feel like you're just going to be forever. Although it's hard to solve this, these 20 things to do when you are single should help keep you from thinking negatively. Maybe they will lead you to "the real thing" or whatever else you truly need.