Moving in together is a significant commitment, often being just one step away from marriage. However, many people underestimate the gravity of the decision. To avoid potential problems, it's best to avoid cohabiting if you can relate to any of the following reasons.
1. Things have suddenly taken a major downturn in your relationship, and you're fighting almost every day
Moving in together may not improve a strained relationship, and instead can lead to being confined with someone you may end up breaking up with. It's advisable to hold off on cohabiting until the relationship improves.
2. He's gotten violent, emotionally abusive, or controlling
Do not move in with someone who has been causing you harm, whether it be mental, emotional, or physical. This will only lead to negative consequences and may cause permanent damage to your life. This is a serious warning, proceed with caution.
3. You're really not financially stable enough
Moving out before you are financially ready can lead to financial stress and potentially even eviction. It's important to wait until you are financially prepared to move out, avoiding any negative consequences.
4. He's not financially stable enough to handle it
If you are not able and willing to financially support both of you, be cautious of moving in with someone who may be using you for financial gain. It's important to consider the motivations behind the decision to move in together.
5. One or both of you have a lot of growing up to do
If either of you struggles with managing finances or controlling emotions, it's best to wait until you have more maturity and stability before moving in together. Living together requires emotional and financial maturity, so it's important to have your life together before making this step.
6. In all honesty, you really don't see the relationship progressing to marriage
Moving in with a boyfriend without the intent to get married in the future, doesn't make sense in the long term. It's important to consider the future of your relationship before making the decision to move in together.
7. You really go out of your way to clean The house before he arrives
If one of you has unrealistic expectations of the other's cleaning and organization habits, it may lead to disappointment when living together. It's important to have a realistic understanding of each other's lifestyle and habits before moving in together to avoid potential conflicts.
8. You don't feel comfortable being yourself around him
If you feel more relaxed around other people than with your partner or if you feel the need to constantly please them, it's important to remember that living together means seeing each other at your best, worst and most vulnerable. Moving in together should be a comfortable decision, not one based on feeling pressure to please the other person.
9. Your life goals are as similar as black and white
Moving in together should be based on shared life goals, if not it will lead to power struggles and resentment. Make sure you both have a similar game plan for the future before moving in together.
10. Your gut is begging you to stay where you are
It's important to listen to your instincts when making major life decisions. If you have doubts or discomfort about moving in together, it may be best to not go through with it. Trust your gut feeling.
11. You get the feeling that you're basically trying to convince other people how happy you both are together
If you feel the need to justify the reason for moving in together, it may be a sign that your motives are not in line. Moving in should be a natural decision, based on mutual love and shared life goals. If you question your motives, it's worth taking a step back and re-evaluating the decision.
12. He's putting a lot of pressure on you to move, despite you saying that you don't feel comfortable with it
The need to justify the reason for moving in together may indicate hidden motives, which should be addressed before making a decision. Also, if your partner is not respecting your boundaries, it's a red flag and should be addressed before moving in together. Both of these issues are important to address before taking this step.
13. The reason you're moving in with him is to get him to stop bringing up marriage
Moving in together will not stop discussions about marriage and may lead to more pressure from your partner. Using cohabitation as a way to avoid marriage talks is unfair to your partner and may cause confusion or hurt feelings. It's important to have open and honest communication about your intentions and feelings before moving in together.
14. It feels too soon
Everyone has a different timeline for major life decisions. If you feel that moving in together is not the right time for you, it's important to listen to your own feelings and not rush into it.
15. You're doing it to fix problems in your relationships
Moving in together should not be used as a solution to fix problems in a relationship. If the issues are not related to commitment, moving in will not solve them. If you're considering moving in together as a band-aid for other problems, it's likely to lead to regret. This is similar to the idea that having a baby will not fix a bad relationship.
