13 Signs The Guy You're "Talking" To Doesn't Actually Want To Date You

The honeymoon phase is characterized by excitement and optimism about a new relationship, but if your partner is becoming increasingly distant and unresponsive, it may be a sign that they're not interested in continuing the relationship. Difficulty making plans, constant cancellations, and prioritizing time with friends over time with you are all indicators that they may not want to date you.

1. He's not technically single yet

It's understandable that the situation may be difficult, as your partner is in the process of ending a previous relationship and may not be fully single yet. He may not see it as a problem, but it's important to have open and honest communication about how this affects your relationship. He may not understand why it bothers you, but it's important to express your feelings and concerns.

2. He describes anything about his previous relationship as "complicated"

When your partner uses phrases like "he's in the middle of a break-up" or "he's not really single" to avoid explaining his current romantic status, it's important to be cautious. Be aware that these statements may be used to obscure the truth and trust that there may be a deeper reason. It's important to communicate openly and ask for clarification if you feel you are being given an incomplete or ambiguous picture of their relationship status.

3. He seems on really good terms with his ex

It's positive that your partner isn't speaking negatively about his previous girlfriend and that they maintain a cordial relationship, but it can also be concerning if they continue to have a close relationship. It's important to reflect on the reasons why they broke up and consider if there are any unresolved feelings or issues that may affect your relationship. It may be worth having an open and honest conversation with your partner about your concerns.

4. He makes a point of telling you that he's not ready for anything serious

It's commendable when individuals are upfront about wanting a casual relationship, but it's important to be aware if someone uses this excuse as a way to lead you on while they make up their mind about what they want. If someone is acting like you're in a committed relationship, but still maintaining that they only want something casual, it's important to be cautious and have a clear understanding of the terms of your relationship.

5. It takes him forever to answer your texts

Being busy or distracted is not a problem on its own, but if it becomes a consistent pattern, it can make one feel unimportant and overlooked. It's important to communicate with your partner if you feel that their busyness or distraction is affecting your relationship, and to have a clear understanding of how to prioritize your relationship moving forward.

6. Yet, he's always on his phone when you're hanging out

It's concerning when your partner is consistently on their phone while spending time with you and not responding to your messages in a timely manner. This behavior may indicate that they are not as invested in the relationship as you are. It's important to communicate your feelings and concerns about this issue and to have a clear understanding of each other's priorities in the relationship.

7. Every time the topic of dating comes up, he avoids it like the plague

If your partner is avoiding discussions about commitment and shutting down any conversation related to it, it's an indication that they are not interested in committing to the relationship. This can be frustrating, especially if you just want to clarify what you both want in the relationship. It's important to communicate openly and honestly with your partner about your feelings and expectations and to respect their boundaries.

8. You are entirely separate from the rest of his life

If your partner is not interested in introducing you to their friends, family, or mutual friends, it may be a sign that they do not see the relationship as serious or long-term. It's important to pay attention to this behavior and consider if it aligns with your own feelings and expectations for the relationship. Open communication with your partner about your concerns and the direction of the relationship is crucial in this situation.

9. The two of you don't go out on actual dates

If your partner consistently suggests hanging out at your place and making minimal effort in terms of planning outings or activities, it may be a sign that they are not invested in the relationship. This type of behavior can make you feel like you're not a priority, and it may indicate that they are not willing to put in the effort to make the relationship meaningful.

10. He doesn't think twice about canceling

He often cancels plans and does not prioritize spending time with you, indicating that he does not value your time or company.

11. You don't know what he looks like in natural light

He only makes plans to see you in the evenings, which could suggest that he doesn't want to be seen in public with you during the day.

12. You're nowhere near social media official

He does not include you on his social media by not tagging you in pictures, replying to comments, liking your statuses or shares, or showing you in any of his photos.

13. He assures you that he's just "bad at relationships"

It appears that the relationship is not genuine and may be used as a backup option for when he chooses to back out. This allows him to have a convenient excuse.

14. He's super happy with the way things are – aren't you?

When pressed for a commitment, he may say that things are good as they are without any boundaries, rules, or definitions. He may also imply that you should be content with the uncertainty and insecurity in the relationship. He may also suggest that you should question why you want to be in a relationship with someone who is not willing to commit.

Why He Keeps Talking To You Even Though He Doesn't Want A Relationship With You

Dating can be confusing and frustrating, especially when it comes to understanding the actions and intentions of a partner.

1. He's bored

He likely sees the relationship as a way to fill his time as he has nothing else going on. He may end the relationship as soon as something more interesting or better comes along, but for now, he is content with the casual, non-committed arrangement.

2. He kinda likes you, just not enough

He may not want to be in a committed relationship with you, but he still wants to maintain some form of connection. He may not want to lose you completely, but he doesn't want to put in the effort to be in a relationship. He may keep you "on the hook" until he loses interest or finds someone else.

3. He wants to get laid

If you're having sexual relations with him while hoping for a commitment, but not receiving one in return, you are allowing him to take advantage of the situation. By continuing to have sex with him, you are showing him that he can have physical intimacy without committing to a relationship. To gain clarity on his true intentions, it would be best to stop sleeping with him and see if he continues to be interested in the relationship. This can reveal a lot about his true intentions.

What To Do When You Realize The Guy You Like Doesn't Want To Date You

1. Call him out on it

You should not attempt to change his mind or feel sorry for yourself because he is not interested in a committed relationship, but you should confront him for not being honest about his intentions from the start. Your time is valuable, and it is not worth spending it with someone who has no intention of moving forward in the relationship.

2. Hold fast to your self-respect

It may be tempting to remain in an almost relationship with the hope that it may develop into something more, but it is unlikely to happen. By clinging to this hope or allowing yourself to be manipulated by someone who only returns your attention when they sense you're losing interest, you are undermining your self-worth and dignity. You deserve better and should not settle for less.

3. Walk away

If you want a serious and long-term relationship and he only wants a casual one, the best option is to end things right away. It may be difficult and a disappointment if you had strong feelings for him and have invested time and energy into the relationship, but in the long run, it's for the best for you to move on.

4. Vow to recognize the signs next time

It is not your fault for having positive intentions and high hopes when you started dating this person. It's important to maintain a positive outlook on love and dating, but it's also wise to be aware of the signs that someone may not be serious about a relationship. The experience of dating a time-waster can be a valuable lesson, so take note of the red flags and be more aware of them in future relationships. This will help you detect them early on and avoid getting involved in a similar situation.

5. Make your intentions clear

If you were upfront about wanting a serious relationship and he pretended to be on the same page, then he is at fault. However, if you were not clear about your relationship goals and tried to play it cool to avoid scaring him off, then it is important to be more straightforward about what you want in the future. Being clear about your relationship goals early on will prevent future misunderstandings and wasted time.

If you're seeking advice on determining whether or not he's truly interested in dating you, refer to the video from dating expert Mat Boggs below.