11 Terrible Realities Of Being The Other Woman


Relationships can be complex and defy easy definitions. The occurrence of infidelity can introduce a host of complications. Society holds strong opinions regarding both cheaters and their partners in infidelity. Contrary to popular belief, being the "other woman" is far from a glamorous or exciting experience; rather, it is often a significant source of stress and frustration.

1. The uncertainty comes in waves

Having been the third party in multiple relationships, I can attest that this is the most challenging aspect. The uncertainty of where the relationship is heading and whether the promises made will be kept creates constant anxiety. It's difficult to enjoy moments of happiness when the fear of it all coming to an end looms overhead.


2. Your friends and family probably won't approve

Being in a relationship with someone you can't openly display to important people in your life is challenging. Others may not understand your reasoning for being involved with someone who is already committed, and may even distance themselves from you because of it.

3. There'll be many moments when you feel like an option

If you don't prefer polyamorous relationships, being the other woman can be emotionally draining. The disappointment of canceled plans due to their partner and rushed stolen moments can make you feel unimportant in their life. If you're not cautious, this could harm your self-esteem.


4. You can't always share special occasions with the person you're dating

Spending special occasions like Valentine's Day, birthdays, Christmas, and other significant events alone because your partner is with their other partner can be infuriating. Even if you do spend time together, you can't share pictures on social media due to the secrecy of the relationship.


5. The secrecy gets old after a while

Being in love and having someone special in your life can make you want to share your happiness with the world. However, as the other woman, your relationship must remain a secret, and there will be limitations on where you can go and things you can do together to avoid being seen. It can feel like you are an outsider in your own relationship.


6. You have to live with other people's judgment and maybe even your own

Society views the other woman as a homewrecker, a person lacking moral principles, and deserving of scorn and mistreatment. However, if you are highly sensitive to the judgments and criticisms of others, you will frequently feel let down, ashamed, and resentful of yourself.


7. You get sick of playing the waiting game

Being in a relationship where your partner has other commitments can limit your ability to be spontaneous. You may need to consider their schedule before making plans and wait for their approval, including deciding when to spend time together. You may have to accept that the time and attention your partner can give you is limited, which can be frustrating. This situation can blur the boundaries between being considerate and feeling overlooked or undervalued.


8. You're always low-key hoping they choose you

While some women may be content with being the other woman and desire nothing more, most are hoping for a different outcome. They are waiting for the day when their partner will recognize their worth and end their current relationship. These women believe that their love and persistence will eventually prevail. However, while this hope can be comforting, it is not always realistic and may remain mere wishful thinking. At times, it may come to fruition, while other times, it may remain a mere illusion.


9. Stolen moments are all you get to live on

You may not be able to see your lover as frequently as you desire. The time you spend together has to be borrowed from their already busy schedule, which often means you are limited to only a few hours at a time and occasional weekends. This can be challenging, especially if you are fully devoted to the relationship.


10. You're giving up a lot more than your partner

If you are expected to remain loyal to your partner while they maintain their other relationship, it creates an unfair dynamic. Even if they make assurances about ending things with their current partner, you will still have to make significant sacrifices in the interim.

11. Heartbreak is always a real and looming possibility

As the other woman, you are aware that what you have can easily slip away at any moment, leaving you with a sense of uncertainty. In some cases, you may not even get the opportunity for closure when it ends. Even if you are the one who decides to end the affair, the emotional toll it takes can be overwhelming and unforeseeable.