It's terrible to have an unsupportive partner, even if your aspirations are unconventional. With perseverance and a lot of encouragement, anything is achievable, and your partner should be your biggest supporter. Here are some tips for dealing with a relationship where your partner appears to be unsupportive.
1. Ask yourself if this is a trend
If your long-term partner suddenly becomes unsupportive, take a moment to reflect on why. Perhaps they have reservations about your plans that they're hesitant to voice. If your partner typically supports you in everything, their behavior may be more situational than a reflection of their character. Remember, they are entitled to their own viewpoint, which may differ from yours.
2. Be compassionate towards him and your proposed life plan
It's possible that you may not be offering enough support to your partner's goals and aspirations, and they're projecting their feelings onto you. Have an open conversation with them about your collective future. Perhaps they feel left out of your latest plan. Find out if there are any common goals you both share and work together to develop a plan. However, if your partner continues to be pessimistic or controlling about your decisions, it may be time to consider ending the relationship.
3. Truly listen to what they have to say
It's likely that your partner is not a monster; they may just have a different perspective on the situation. Before jumping to conclusions and getting into an argument, it's important to listen to them and consider their viewpoint. If they have your best interests at heart, it's worth taking their input into account.
4. Always keep them informed
Your partner may not be aware of the extensive research and planning you've done for your upcoming move or job promotion. It's possible that they only know bits and pieces and aren't aware of how important it is to you. Similarly, if you're starting a business, they may not know the level of effort you're putting into securing permits, buildings, and loans. Communicate the details of your plans with them. If they still aren't supportive, don't allow it to deter you from pursuing your goals.
5. Admit your own reservations
Demonstrating that you are aware of the potential advantages and disadvantages of your project will indicate to your partner that you're not blindly committing to something that's bound to fail. This will facilitate ongoing dialogue and reassure them that your decision is not impulsive.
6. Go to a counselor
Communication may be a significant problem in your relationship. If your partner is willing to involve a third party, seeking the guidance of a professional is preferable to turning to a friend. It can facilitate open dialogue and resolve any lingering issues. If you envision a future with your partner, it's worth considering.
7. Stay optimistic
Dealing with someone who is unsupportive can introduce a significant amount of negativity. Such individuals may try to discourage you. If, for instance, you aspire to attend medical school, but your partner is attempting to dissuade you because it doesn't align with their future goals, it's important to remind yourself that your future is at stake too. Let them know that forgoing your dream isn't an option, but you're open to working together to find a compromise that benefits you both.
8. Figure out if you need them to execute your plan
It's important not to coerce someone into a significant life change if they're not interested, even if it's related to your dream. If, for instance, you plan to start a food truck but require your partner to serve as the chef, their lack of support may be due to their inability to share your vision. It's critical to be self-sufficient and independent. Ultimately, the only support you genuinely require is your own. If you're determined to accomplish something, you'll discover that you must always be the motivating force to achieve it.
9. Try a trial separation
While not the preferred solution, taking a break from the relationship could have benefits if both parties agree to the same terms. It could provide an opportunity to reassess the relationship and consider important factors, such as the level of dependence on one another, the true impact of the lack of support, and personal happiness in the absence of negativity.
10. Remember, you can't please everyone
If your partner is unsupportive of your aspirations, such as wanting to attend school in California instead of staying on the east coast, it's important to prioritize your own goals and follow your heart. Often, lack of support may stem from fear of a long-distance relationship, but it's crucial to consider potential regret if you don't pursue what you truly want. Ultimately, your personal aspirations should take precedence over a relationship, as you owe it to yourself to live the life you desire.