For some women, stereotypical romance doesn't cut it. The excessive focus on words, gifts, and grand gestures can be overwhelming and off-putting. These women aren't opposed to love; they just prefer to express it differently. If you can relate, here are 10 struggles you'll understand.
1. People Assume That You're "Damaged"
People often assume that those who don't buy into traditional displays of romance must be emotionally scarred from a past relationship. They believe these women are too fearful to allow love back into their lives. In reality, those who shun over-the-top displays of affection simply don't want random bouquets or surprise bubble baths interrupting their lives. There's a distinction to be made.
2. The Ways Your Show Love Go Unnoticed Or Unappreciated
There's no one right way to express love. Maybe you're not into gushy declarations of devotion or lavish gift-giving. Instead, you show love by being a great partner in the bedroom or providing emotional support during tough times. Sometimes, you wish you could shout, "I'm doing this because I love you!" since your partner doesn't seem to grasp your intentions.
3. You Get Embarrassed By Grand Romantic Gestures
You dread the thought of your partner arranging a harpist, rose petals, and public proposals. These sorts of stunts leave you feeling embarrassed and uneasy, and you hate how your partner may blame you when they don't go according to plan. They should know better, especially after being with you for so long.
4. You Giggle At The Worst Times
It can be challenging not to laugh when a man is pouring his heart out to you in an overly dramatic way. You don't want to be cruel, but it's tough to keep a straight face when he's saying something absurd, such as comparing your hair to silk. It's just a blowout, and he should probably calm down.
5. You've Been Called Cold Or Heartless
Your emotions are just as valid as anyone else's, even if you express them differently. It's unfair to be called heartless for not appreciating a crummy love song from your boyfriend; he should know what you like and don't like. Your partner should understand what makes you happy and you don't need to pretend to be someone you're not just to please them.
6. Men Assume They Can Coast In Your Relationship
While you may not care for certain romantic gestures, you still expect your partner to make an effort. It doesn't have to involve grand gestures like writing poetry or professional photo shoots, but a little effort goes a long way in showing that they care.
7. Romcoms Disgust You
Can anyone write a female lead character that readers can relate to? Falling in love isn't all about crying over ice cream and needing to be rescued from your mundane life. It's about discovering someone who is your equal and can be your partner in all aspects of life. When friends invite you to watch the latest sappy romance movie, you might only agree if it's at a theater that serves alcohol.
8. You Get Accused Of "Trying To Be One Of The Guys"
Disliking sappy romance doesn't make you any less of a woman. You're simply being true to yourself, and there are men out there who also don't care for romance. It's important to remember that interests and preferences are not gender-specific.
9. Holidays Are The Worst
You're not keen on making reservations a month in advance to overpay for a prix fixe menu that ends with a heart-shaped dessert. Rather than receiving extravagant gifts, you prefer going on a trip or attending a concert with your partner. It would be great if everyone could tone down the grandiose displays of affection during big holidays and avoid forcing giant love gestures on each other several times a year. This puts undue pressure on one day, and you'd rather spread the love evenly throughout the year.
10. You're Expected To Spell Out Everything That's Important To You
There are men who struggle to understand what matters to women when it doesn't conform to stereotypes. For instance, if you don't appreciate receiving flowers or chocolates, it can be frustrating when men fail to recognize what you do value. It may seem obvious to you, but they just can't seem to grasp it. However, at least they are learning that stereotypes are meaningless, and that's a step in the right direction.