10 Signs He Is Not Putting Enough Effort Into The Relationship


Sustaining a healthy relationship demands concerted efforts, ranging from organizing date nights, providing emotional support, to participating in decisions that will impact both partners. However, if one person fails to contribute their fair share, it can have a negative impact on the relationship. It's common to fall into a pattern of not expecting much from someone who puts in little effort, but once you become aware of signs that indicate they are not doing their part, it becomes difficult to overlook them.

1. You Usually Text Him First

At the start of a relationship, it can be challenging to avoid monitoring who initiates most of the conversations. As time passes, this tendency typically evens out or becomes less significant. However, if you perceive that your partner never takes the initiative to contact you, it could be a sign of disinterest. Alternatively, it could indicate that your partner is aware of your tendency to initiate contact, and therefore feels comfortable sitting back and letting you take the lead. This behavior could also be characterized as laziness.

2. You Plan Most Of Your Dates

In the early stages of a relationship, brainstorming ideas for a date night seems effortless because everything is new, and you have not exhausted all the conventional date activities. However, as the relationship progresses, many couples tend to forego actual dates, leading to a sense of monotony. If you are the only one consistently initiating fun activities, it's not holding your partner accountable. Despite the comfort that comes with being together, it's essential to keep the relationship fresh and exciting, and both parties should continue to make an effort to keep the flame alive.

3. You Have To Remind Him Of Significant Dates

While not everyone is fond of grand romantic gestures and costly presents on every occasion, it's essential not to neglect special events like anniversaries and birthdays. These milestones represent another year of togetherness, and it's crucial to recognize and commemorate them in a manner that suits you as a couple. However, if your partner repeatedly forgets your anniversary, even after you've emphasized its significance, it indicates a lack of effort. Remembering dates can be challenging, but calendar reminders exist on most phones, making it a simple task. Thus, there's no valid excuse for forgetting important dates.

4. He Never Brings Up The Future

Unless both parties have mutually agreed to a casual relationship, the purpose of dating is to seek a long-term companion. If you have attempted to discuss the direction of your relationship with your partner, but they continuously evade the conversation, it's a sign that they are not committed to you, and they do not want you to know. They prefer leading you on instead of being truthful about their intentions and risking the possibility of you ending the relationship yourself, which is unjust to you. Open and honest communication is vital, and if your partner cannot be candid about their desires, regardless of what they may be, then they are not putting in sufficient effort.

5. He Never Asks You Questions

Have you ever caught yourself sharing details of your day, workplace promotion, arguments with your sister, or weekend plans with him, only to realize that he didn't even inquire about them? In fact, if you hadn't volunteered the information, he wouldn't have known what's going on with you. If your partner doesn't demonstrate an interest in asking questions or listening to your responses, it's a clear indication that he lacks concern for you as a whole.

6. He Doesn't Care What He Looks Like

Undoubtedly, physical appearance is not everything, and if you are in a relationship with someone, you likely find them attractive to some degree. However, if your partner spends an entire weekend with you without bothering to shower, shave, or show any level of concern for their grooming, but meticulously primp themselves and dress up when going out with their friends, it's apparent that they are capable of proper hygiene and grooming but do not deem you important enough to put in the effort to look and smell their best. You should take this as an insult because it is one.

7. He Doesn't Try To Get To Know Your Friends And/Or Family

It's expected that if your partner is genuinely interested in you, he would prioritize making a positive impression on the significant people in your life. This is a fundamental aspect of being a good partner. If he avoids spending time with them or doesn't make an effort to present himself well around them, it's a significant warning sign that he may not envision a future with you. Alternatively, it could be a sign that he lacks relationship skills. In any case, it would be wise to consider ending the relationship.

8. He Only Cares About Himself In Bed

Regardless of whether your relationship is casual or serious, failing to put in the effort to please your partner sexually is unacceptable. It's not necessary to be an expert in every aspect of intimacy, but demonstrating genuine effort can make a significant difference. Does your partner inquire about your preferences? Are they receptive to exploring new things? Do they pay attention to your responses to their actions? If the answer to these questions is a resounding no, then it's time to consider finding someone who will prioritize your sexual satisfaction.

9. He Makes Excuses To Avoid Doing Anything For You

The most exceptional partners are the ones who proactively assist you without requiring any requests. They do it out of a sincere desire to support and improve your life, even if it's in the smallest way. Consider this: when you have strong feelings for someone, don't you typically make an effort to perform thoughtful gestures for them frequently? If your partner doesn't exhibit such behavior, it could mean that he doesn't feel as strongly for you or that he's not willing to put in the effort. Neither of these possibilities bode well for the relationship.

10. He Never Compromises

Compromise is an indispensable aspect of any relationship. There will always be instances where both parties have to make concessions to ensure the success of the relationship in the long run, but if your partner insists on having things their way 100% of the time, it's an indication that they are not committed to your happiness or the relationship's long-term success. Compromise can be challenging, but you willingly make adjustments for someone you love. If your partner is not doing their part in this regard, they are not putting in the kind of effort that you deserve from a partner.